F61
Desperate housewives of rhp
May 10 2017
Comments
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RHP User
8 years ago
didn't mean to exclude cross gender and since this is role play, chicks can be guys or whatever, I'm thinking Betty and Annie might be a good match, that is if they can afford the licquor bill every month 😂
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RHP User
8 years ago
Hogging my own topic already but meant to say you would have to fight kool for Betty's heart 😍
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Seachange
8 years ago
I've got my popcorn in the microwave and cider chilling. Sitting back and ready to watch. Oh dear me. Ha
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RHP User
8 years ago
I didn't watch any version of these shows, but from the ad's it's the gardeners who seem to do best of the guys 😜 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Lily 😀😉 me too
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Sawadee
8 years ago
For a minute there Touch , I had sex in the city in my mind and seen you as that spunky blonde lady that fucks everyone she can lay her hands on.. 😄 hehe... Not that I think you would do that in real life.. 😱. Opps , yes I do.. 😎. As usual you make me smile / laugh when I read your posts... Keep it up you lovely kinky sexy thang you ... 😉 PS... Oh , btw , You can me as the hunk everyone wants to get their slippery lil fingers on if you want... take me , take me... Awww cmon now , caus I'm a hunk... 😇 Jay. 😜
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RHP User
8 years ago
On Pool Maintenance.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Awesome so we already have a gardener, pool boy and Jay you'll be the local personal trainer the wives have affairs with, when they're not busy with the pool boy or gardener 😂😂
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RHP User
8 years ago
Pfffftttt you only think that mirrored window that rolls up is one way glass? Hell no, it's just a glare screen to improve the movie camera imaging! I can only imagine what will go on in those soft leather seats! Both hands on the wheel, keep your eyes on the road, pedal to the metal and play it again, Sam. Order advance copies of the video for just $49.95 from now until hell freezes over! ...call me Jeeves the Limo Jockey
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RHP User
8 years ago
We have a rather dubious limo driver lol 😁 still waiting for our first couple to arrive. All else fails, I'll propose to, aha not telling you that 😉 but if this director has to take a role, there will be more than one 😇 along with the pool boy, gardener, well you get the picture 😊
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RHP User
8 years ago
Is the safe word Boise or Palestine?
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RHP User
8 years ago
Samantha, yes I'm just like her. Minus the heels, money, designer clothes, but strip her back 😉 and that's me 😀 all I can think of when I think of her is her line in the movie 'My dog ran up on your dick' haha and Dante omfg who could forget him nude under the shower, I wanted to jump in the screen 😛😜
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langton11
8 years ago
I'll be some white collar (because I polish up ok in a suit) subtle looking quiet dude that is incredibly dodgy when no one is looking and never gets caught. I'll let I_Touch fill in the details (this could be my undoing before I even begin lol)
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
I'll be Betty's and Kool's nanny, looking after their love child. Secretly banging both of them without either knowing. Whenever I'm sober enough.........
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RHP User
8 years ago
Love it Annie 😂😂
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RHP User
8 years ago
Well Fran Drescher did pretty well with her role in ''The Nanny'' so give it a shot. ''Annie the Nanny'' could do at least as well as half the garbage on TV now. Dan Murphy's would easily cough up for advertising! Warning this program is rated ''M''. Best..... CM
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RHP User
8 years ago
Not too sure what's going on, but pretty sure I don't want to be in the house! So, can I be the delivery 'boi' - gender fluid, with a fluctuating sexuality ? 2. I live aloooong way from this place. Say down at the estate at the bottom of the hill. Live in a house with a dozen Aunties (awww, Annie... memories). Work: delivery to the Housewives. Net worth: Tips 3. Sweet as fuck. No relationships, my Aunties don't let me date 4. .... 5. Lotta 6. Eliza (an old poodle that is so old it slobbers on my shoes went it when I get home from a long night of delivering, but I still call her puppy, even though she is a doggy)
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Sawadee
8 years ago
..the personal trainer.. 🙄
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Seachange
8 years ago
As I'm enjoying my sushi lunch outside in downtown Melbourne and watching the world go by, I thought I'd walk into the set with my chefs knife and foldaway pitchfork. You never know when you need the latter handy as seems de riguer in the forum house to carry them for the next witch hunt and sacrificial burning. Lol 😁 I love to cook and this role comes natural. I'll prepare a degustation for the house, sprinkling of love potion no. 9 for those I like or perhaps a dash of arsenic for the week pain in the arse. Ok. No arsenic as don't want to kill off the main characters. However, a good serving of potent laxative in their meal would be interesting scene. What's a show without drama? Days of our Rhp lives.
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RHP User
8 years ago
I am married to Kool, we have a love child and chose Annie as our nanny (oh gawd, can you imagine a child raised by us Annie? ), and I'm shagging Annie, as is Kool... Pepper might not be able to date, but she spends a lot of time 'delivering' stuffs to me when Kool is at work and Annie is too pissed to put out. Just don't tell the aunties!! I love my life
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RHP User
8 years ago
I will be the mechanic 😉 Fix all running gear that needs a service or special attention - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
My employers have issues going on. My Madam seems to be having a sexual relationship with the delivery girl. Not that I blame her at all, the delivery girl is rather hot. But it means I'm left with the child for much of the day which has meant that I have bonded deeply like a parent. These 2 parents don't deserve the child and are caught up in their own worlds. What is deeply deserving of my Mr, and who has become my dominant in a dom/sub relationship, is that l walked in on him in the kitchen. There he was, putting pineapple on his pizza. I've been so upset. Crying for days........
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RHP User
8 years ago
😂😂😂 love it all. Great stuff, and there's a rumour the director has been giving extra direction to some of the cast, just a rumour at this stage though, hasn't been confirmed 😉
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RHP User
8 years ago
Pineapple on his pizza?? What have you done to my man? You broke him!! Ok, I'll do you a deal, delicious nanny of ours... I'll hire someone else to help out around the house... I'll even let you choose who we should hire In the interim, I'll spend more time with my child (what's it's name again?), enabling you more time to play with the spiky end of a pineapple (Kool loves that!), and I'll ask Pepper to bring up a few bottles of your favourite bubbles when she makes her next 'delivery'... Just try to stay awake until I visit you later
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lik2watch59
8 years ago
I'll be the veterinarian that has his own practice in down town Bayswater that is contracted to look after the forever horny black and white Great Dane (His name is Balls) and the golden brown Siamese cat (Her name is Spit) (Well that's what she does!!!)I'll be contracted to walk "Balls" every day on the 5 acre property that Betty and Kool live on. I'll have to make sure that "Spit" & "Balls" are feed and groomed every day.I'll walk Balls on the pristine lawn that "Fit Geek" looks after but I won't pick up that bid dump he does every morning. I'm just wondering if Betty is going to get that Budgerigar that she always wanted?? Will I have to look after that too???
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RHP User
8 years ago
Well I can be the Plumber.... I have all the correct tools!
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RHP User
8 years ago
Okay, so Betty's son is Bretty 😉 he's the good child, everyone adores him. Kool's daughter 'Jewel', well it's believed kool isn't her father and some say Betty isn't her Mother 😀 no idea how the hell she got here 😉 but she sensed there was an ownership problem and rebelled. She was caught with Sailbad the pool boy and the Fit-geek the gardener, having an alcohol induced ( the nanny hasn't been the best influence there) steamy session by the pool. So Betty and Kool hire a personal trainer for her to occupy her time and steer her toward a healthier lifestyle. However Jay the personal trainer was found to be having extended sessions with her 😉 that is until the nanny arrived one day wearing sexy lingerie and heels, and caught Jay's attention. A sucker for long slender legs and a tight nicely rounded edible butt, Jay now moved his focus to Annie 😍 In the next episode, Jewel gets angry, steals the Porsche to leave home but breaks down only a few blocks from home, enter the mechanic 'Libido', and the limo drive, Jeeves 😉 and Betty and Kool find Jewel settles down when home alone with the cook. The cook Lily, seems to be able to control her, no-one knows why but seems to be able to calm her down, get her to sit and stink oops I mean sit and think 😊 she definitely behaves though, when she's with Lily 😧 Further into the episode, the director (moi 😄) calls her accountant Langton and asks him to assess her 'assets' 😯 and the delivery girl pepper and Annie the nanny's madam, disappear. Suspected murder, police have been searching the aunties' basement 😀
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RHP User
8 years ago
Pepper and the madam are suspected murdered
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RHP User
8 years ago
Please feel free to add/change the storyline, names, bring people back from the dead, whatever you feel like 😁
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RHP User
8 years ago
Thanks for joining the cast 😉
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sebastian. Our childs name is Sebastian, remember? And Bach for his middle name was your mothers idea, wasn't it? From those years when she ran off to be a Skid Row groupie when you were a teen?And so this Pepper delivers for the pizza place? You told me his name was Dougie! She seems nice but, honey....and rather "well developed" for a 17yo. Whatever. Do you think you could get her to throw in some garlic bread for free? I do like their garlic bread.I'm flat out tomorrow, Ive got a huge day at work...do you think nanny Annie would mind taking Sebastian to classes? I just hope we don't have to collect him from that gentlemans club like the last time she babysat..
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Seachange
8 years ago
Do we get to have those long uncomfortable stare in the air poignant moments 😮 when we hear the disappearances? Like in the soap operas? What about the bloody basement? 😨 with a suspected murder, surely we will have some debonair detective around giving us the third degree? I'm sure some of us won't mind a good frisking? 😍😋 Takers? The plot thickens.... 😎
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RHP User
8 years ago
Righto Lily, auditions for the debonair detectives mmm looking forward to the auditions 😍 love the poignant pauses lol 😀 Debonair detectives, step forward please 😯
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sounds like you have your hands full, lucky you have such a proactive nanny 😀 and reminding Betty of your child's name haha love it 😂😂
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RHP User
8 years ago
Hi and welcome to the cast 😉 well we now have a vet and a plumber. We are ready for any emergency, think we'll need all the help we can get 😀 The plot thickens 😯
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
I was a suspect because they caught me washing Betty's sheets. But it's only because Im expected to. They are always saturated after the Pizza gets delivered. Go figure....... And l like clean sheets when l service madam. Kool is shitty because l take his child down the gentleman's club but it's the only chance the child gets to see her father. Did l just say that? Besides it's a good chance to earn some money and they have some outstanding champagne down there. The owner has a huge cock. Used to put a huge smile on Betty's face
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RHP User
8 years ago
Things move quickly. I'm potentially knocked off? Because of the blood in the basement? I really should have kept quiet about my blood fetish (looks at Betty) And just prior I was about to bring the delivery receipt for the mass order of pineapple, and who really ordered it. Somehow it got mixed up with some surprising genetic testing results. Why the Aunties have these, I can't imagine
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sparticus73
8 years ago
A charismatic surgeon ( Mancini).🤔 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Not sure who the madam is? If it's me, I refuse to be dead - refuse, I tell you!! 😂 Pepper the pizza delivery boi is, in fact, perfectly safe... for now. The aunties discovered that more than pizza was being 'delivered' up the hill, so I sent her on a little holiday until things settle down. Last I heard she was 'delivering' hints from one end of the beach to the other 😉 I'll tell the police to leave you alone Annie Jewel is clearly not our daughter - Kool and I are far too young to have a daughter that age 😎 She is the illegitimate love child of my wayward mother (making her my half sister, for those so caught up in the story that they miss the little details). No one knows who her father is - once we looked at the long list of potentials, we felt it better not to know 🙄 Kool, darling...not sure how to tell you, so I'll just spit it out (that will be a first 😜)... I took Sebastian and Annie to the gentleman's club that day. As Annie said, the owner has a magnificent cock and I just can't keep away. On that particular day he managed to fuck me into a coma (not literally - no need to call the dr!), so Annie - ever the fabulous friend - covered for me. We did think you'd be too busy with the huge delivery of pineapple to miss us - I should have flicked you into a coma (with Annie's help, of course) before going out - my bad 😔 Annie, Kool has been shitty lately, as have I. Our tummies seen constantly unsettled and we spend a ridiculous amount of time on the toilet. While we look fabulous 😍, I'm a little concerned about this new chef you hired. Her food is fabulous, but I did see a rather large supply of laxatives in her room (yes, I know I shouldn't have been going through her things, but I thought I saw her eyeing off the pool boy, and he can barely manage to keep up with you - if he starts up with Lily, the pool will never be clean!). There was also some kind of potion amongst her belongings... I think I'll start swapping my plate with Jewel - she's always too plastered to notice. I'm going to pop down the hill and see if I can calm down the aunties, time for Pepper to come home. No one else delivers quite like her 👊
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boobsandbusted
8 years ago
Almost 2 pages down Must be time for the director to fuck a young hot guy ,who want s a job in productions , Mr b - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
That's pretty much all she does - casting couch is permanently covered in plastic and still needs to be replaced every few weeks 😎
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boobsandbusted
8 years ago
Wondered why on the application it said must be young ,and enjoy going for a adventurous ride while prooving yourself under pressure ,on a regulars basis , - Posted from rhpmobile
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boobsandbusted
8 years ago
Wondered why on the application it said must be young ,and enjoy going for a adventurous ride while prooving yourself under pressure ,on a regulars basis , - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
It seems we have a visitor or two arriving... The fabulous Ms Jonesy is coming for an extended visit. She is rather fond of knitting cock warmers (just in time for the cooler weather!) She also has a penchant for moon worship (which should fit in nicely with our blood letting ceremonies Kool, Pepper & Annie ). I believe she may bring an entourage with her... you never know with this one! Watch this space... I think we may have a few more people arriving over the next few days...
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RHP User
8 years ago
(I prefer claret-coloured fluid-bonding ceremonies - ammend the order of service, MsMadamBetty)
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ScottishTradie
8 years ago
Need a Tradie with all the right tools to leave a satisfied customer?? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
I am a successful chef... How about the naked chef creating taste-tanterlizing splenders wearing only a waist-apron? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Is that what we are calling it?
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RHP User
8 years ago
(I'm trying not to look like a monster here! I slipped with the blood fetish thing. Got too excited by the basement mess. "Claret coloured fluid" will keep the rating classification for the show suitable for most viewers)
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MsJonesy
8 years ago
Where's Kool? I need to organise a fitting session for his cock warmer. 😁
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
Last I saw him he was messing with his pineapples again. Seeing how many pineapple fritters he can fit on his cock. It was a sticky mess when l finished
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RHP User
8 years ago
Sorry, I've lost it here, crying laughing, I'll need some time to collect myself before resuming direction 😂
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nibblemebi
8 years ago
The runaway streaker Unicorn, whose not really a Unicorn but has a decidedly phallic looking horn somewhere on her head 😉 She frolics free in the fields, thoroughly enjoying the acreage.. and can be sighted more than rarely, peeking into the stables of the young studs the director has stashed away. Naughty voyeuristic Unicorn. .. she needs a spank -if you can catch her! - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
The annoying Ex who pops in now and then. At first everyone is drooling over him but they quickly remember that he's a clown and a lush.
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
Quoting 'sparticus73' A charismatic surgeon ( Mancini).🤔 - Posted from rhpmobileGiving the new surgeon some serious free lap dances. If l work this right, he'll give me a nice set of tits for reduced rate. Noticed the Vet and the plumber down here too. Anyone working today apart from me. Had to lock Betty's kid in the store room for a while. Wouldn't stop crying. Probably need Nibbleme to come work the pole with me. Unicorns get good tips
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LeeC59
8 years ago
Love this, you are all way too creative to just be on this forum!!
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RHP User
8 years ago
This is becoming more of an desperate housemen/workers of rhp? Well count me in, dear director, may I?
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RHP User
8 years ago
I would love to be the detective...a more glamorous and slightly younger Miss Marple perhaps :) Q
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Seachange
8 years ago
I was hoping you would take up the challenge. I had you in mind... and another person but he isn't a regular forum poster. But you would have been a formidable team. I'm ready for my frisking when you are gov'na!!
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Seachange
8 years ago
As hardandhorny walks in on his first day on the job, I see I have my work cut out. I put on my temptress outfit fit for a kitchen queen. Thanks to my mentor, lady Nigella, I have learnt to dress 👗 the part. Unbuttoning the top 4 buttons of my black silk top, I splashed a good amount of eau De cooked-bacon behind my ears. Yes, every chef's kryptonite. A small bottle 🍶 of laxative tucked away inside my deep luscious cleavage, ready to be poured into the pot of pineapple soup he was preparing. As I was about to release Armageddon into the kitchen, I glided to him like a panther on heat, and I could see his wood hard in his hand, pointing at me... Damn, even holding his wooden spoon is sexy.... But he must die... Until....
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Seachange
8 years ago
I'm sure the world renowned director Itm could accommodate you. I saw her changing the sheets on the casting couch, woth your name on it. Ignore the cameras rolling.. This could be good audition material. ahem. Our very own kardashian sex tapes. Ha Reserving copy now... 😉
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RHP User
8 years ago
That's mighty generous of you. Thankyou, one can never have too many cock warmers. Spearmint flavour is my favourite...hot yet cold. Mmmm.... I just dont know what im going to do with all these pineapple fritters now. I should give them to nanny Annie...you know what they say about pineapple juice. She was giving me a sour look today...It might sweeten her up.. 😉
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RHP User
8 years ago
Just who are the real housewives of RHP ? ..a sleuthing challenge me thinks.Marple.
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
You'll obviously see. My hair is too long to be a housewife............
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MsJonesy
8 years ago
But you are one of of our favorite clowns....and I'm fond of propping up the bar with you 😜
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RHP User
8 years ago
Ooh yes you may. Come to my casting couch 😯
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RHP User
8 years ago
lol I won't be able to sleep tonight now, fantasising about my casting couch 😊
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RHP User
8 years ago
There are so many different storylines going on, I leave the set for a day and look what happens. What is a director to do? Hmm Well if I ever re-emerge from the casting couch, I will get the entire cast together and give you all a good spanking for not following the script. Wait, was there a script? 🐒 Q- Miss Marple, love it, you're perfect and you have the role 👍 you'll have your work cut out to figure this one out, but I have faith in you. Welcome to all the new cast members, I'll post a proper response later, but thanks, this is so much fun 😀
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RHP User
8 years ago
Looks cozy, excuse my naive question but why are here some glasses of wine?
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nibblemebi
8 years ago
*Works the pole with Aunty Nanny Annie* Oops. .wrong POLE!!!
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lik2watch59
8 years ago
Dame it, I typed out a whole chapter of antics early this morning in between actually working and its not here. I must have forgotten to hit the post button, "Bugger" Tomorrow I'll be in early to walk Balls and feed Spit. Night
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RHP User
8 years ago
So our little show has had mixed reviews but it seems now has a cult following which has shot our ratings up. Thank God our viewers are just as weird as we are 👍 We might attempt 😏 to tie the storyline together after the weekend, few of the cast seem a little distracted, me included 😜 Before I go on, some breaking news this morning. Casting couch sex tapes have turned up on porn sites. I have been accused of all number of lewd activities on the couch. I'm denying it at this stage, not saying it never happened, just denying it. I'd make a great politician 😀😉 We now have a very diverse cast, providing gripping viewing, well Ms Jonesy has been doing a lot of gripping during cock warmer fittings lol I so want your job 😜 well to be fitted properly, they have to be hard right? Let me know if you need help there, I have some gaps in my schedule this week. Casting couch is out of action while I'm being investigated. Give me notice though because I have a few appointments with langton my accountant 😛 nibblemebi - a lovely mystical unicorn in the paddock on Kool and Betty's 5 acre property seems almost too classy for our twisted show, but going by your last post re nudging poles, you're fitting in nicely, welcome, you might just be the fly on the wall we need to find out what really happens there, because I'm seriously confused lol 👍 Miss Marple will no doubt be on speed dial 😂 Also some speculation re the whereabouts of Lily the cook, who was last seen leaving the property with the In-house Chef de Cunnilingus. No sightings since then, hoping they'll re-emerge after the weekend, we're starving ffs More to come, stay tuned, some suggestion sex tapes from the limo have also surfaced 😎 Jeeves is also denying it 😀 deny deny deny as per your contract 👍
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RHP User
8 years ago
I haven't even scratched the surface there, so many new cast members I want to bring in, time isn't on my side over the weekend, but this is fun, thanks 👍
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RHP User
8 years ago
I have deduced that the so called housewives are just too sexy by far...I doubt with all their extra curricular activity I doubt that any housework is being done :) Marple
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RHP User
8 years ago
It sounds like a young couple is needed to join the casting couch 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
8 years ago
Glasses of wine? You'll need wine to fit in with the rest of the cast 👍 whatever you do under the influence, just deny later 😎
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MrPlayful
8 years ago
The naked house cleaner? I've brought my feather duster, where shall I start?
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nibblemebi
8 years ago
Rest assured that classy, horny and kinky are NOT mutually exclusive 😈 I shall keep the director abreast of any sordidness behind the scenes I come across, and potentially involve myself in. This paddock is seemingly full of Unicorn toys 😆
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Seachange
8 years ago
I will improvise and speak with a thick Columbian accent for my cook. Think Sofia vergara from Modern Family. A-ya-yay!!!
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
Said l could choose an assistant of my choice to help around the house. I'm choosing Mr Playful. First chore is cleaning the showers. He's already in a lather. Appears we have the house to ourselves. Kool has flown out, maybe a suspect in Betty's and the pizza girls disappearance. There are the children but they seem to have taken to the champagne well and are very quiet. Life is good
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PurePeony
8 years ago
Since the ratings are so high, I presume it would be hard to get a spot on the cast. :P How about a submissive, docile maid complete with the French maid outfit? I've changed my profile photo to fire up the imagination. I cook a mean burrito and am always checking out the best, juiciest and thickest sausages to fit snugly into my burrito. No sausage has ever slipped out of my burrito because it's always a snug and tight fit. Eating it might be pretty messy because of all the yummy juices. I'm a domestic goddess for hire. I can be a role playing nanny too and I go the extra mile by taking care of the Mr's needs after the children are tucked in bed. Word of mouth means my maid services are very popular, especially when the Mrs go on business trips or girls' night out. Mr is always beaming with joy when she returns and surprisingly never complains about how much she has charged to the credit card. The house is spick and span, the children are well taken care of, and Mrs is so relieved she starts planning another night out.
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PurePeony
8 years ago
Not competing with you. :P I'm a freelance agent and the maid job is just a front for my real goal - espionage! I steal trade secrets by first getting onto the laps of the top corporate guys who live on the street. There are whispers about how my humble job could pay for the luxurious penthouse I live in. If only they knew...
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Sawadee
8 years ago
Currently accepting new membership... Register now and get your first month free.. Just to wet your appetite , we start by doing a few body stretches, then down to the floor to stretch the hammy's , left leg first , then right.. on to the knees' face down til it touch's the floor ,backside arched , knees apart.. awwwwww,, damn , concentration just went , where was l again ?... 😃
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RHP User
8 years ago
Chef Cunnilingus has just been found dead stabbed through the heart with a boning knife.His head was stuffed in a turkey and placed in a cold oven. The suspects are numerous,Cunnilingus was known as an ageing lothario,hardly a housewife was safe from his considerable charms and there are many aggrieved husbands as well as spurned wives.But at the moment the chief suspect is lily,she spent the night with him or so she says.But he has been dead since 2 o'clock this morning...so where was she ? Marple
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MrPlayful
8 years ago
I was worried he might have been killed in the showers, by Annie's candlestick.
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Seachange
8 years ago
Ahh ahhh ( pulls up panties and Here I am, barely breathing senora, I'm ok. Sorry for my luscious after sex look. 😌 I spent the last 12 hours being ravaged the whole night on the butcher block by.... (stares down the camera 😶) YVES, the new French tennis coach!!! I swear I just brought him some sweat pineapple juice while he was at the tennis courts. yes, it is usual for me to walk around in my French maiden's outfit (borrowed fr peony). His hard young body was irresistible in the searing heat. Sweet sweat dripping. Ooh lah lah. I resisted for a long but he kept talking about him never missing the sweet spot of my racket. I succumbed under pressure 😳. How can any woman resist a half naked man polishing his balls? Tennis balls that is. 😍 I saw the chef sneak into the garden shed with... The plumber!!! He said he'll be checking the plumber's pipe and clear the blockage. A yay yay!!! Plot thickens 😱
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Seachange
8 years ago
I found a few empty pizza boxes in the chef's room!!! Where's the delivery girl? Oh no!!! Is it possible he bats for both sides? 😱 we can't have that in this God fearing neighbourhood!!! 😡 Quelled horreur!!! 😱😵
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lik2watch59
8 years ago
I arrived early this morning to take Balls for his walk around the 5 acre property. I didn't want to speak up about what I found when I arrived but now that it's out in the open I must tell. As I ran up the drive way towards the house here's the limo parked in the drive way out front of the garage door with the back doors wide open and the music playing. I called out to see who was around but I didn't get an answer. How strange I thought !!! I enter the kitchen to prepare to breakfast for Balls and Spit and all I see is the Chef Cunnilingus with his head in the oven. I thought "fuck, what's going on here???" Then I notice the knife sticking out of his chest and realise he's dead. I thought to myself, I don't want to get involved with any of this, I grabbed Balls and he and I jumped in the pool to wash off any evidence. As I was walking Balls and drying off, I was thinking how I was going to get out of this mess.Because the oven (and the dead chef) is on the other side of the island bench in the kitchen and you can't see it when your in the fridge, I'm going with, I came in the back door after our walk, went straight to the fridge to get the scotch fillet that the chef had so kindly prepared for the animals (Gotta love rich people) and feed the animals as usual then left. Oh yeah, Has anyone seen Spit (the Siamese cat) I haven't seen her for several days
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RHP User
8 years ago
Betty and the pizza girl disappeared? I missed that oops 😊 shit I can't keep up 😀 And we have another couple, Peppy and Scott 👍 awesome, now get flirting and get into trouble ASAP you two. We have ratings to think about 😀😉
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Seachange
8 years ago
Did you just hire the new hot PTs for Madame? A his and her combo? Welcome Peppy and Scott. Dont touch the pineapple soup.... 😎
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RHP User
8 years ago
No? Chef Cunnilingus is dead? 😱 were there traces of laxative in his body? 😀
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RHP User
8 years ago
lol love the maid outfit wow you definitely have the role, and your picture, that's amazing 👍 that should heat things up a little/lot 😉
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RHP User
8 years ago
Good question. Even I can't answer that one. I hope Ms Marple can. I think I was either murdered, or a murderer, or off hiding somewhere, or in the Aunties basement. All I know is that I was delivering an awful lot lately. I do wonder what kept the chef so busy that I was called upon so often. Can't only be for the pizza, or pineapple or purely because "No one else delivers quite like her 👊" < thanks for the business tagline, MsMadameBetty
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RHP User
8 years ago
But an awful lot of pepperoni ...so now the person of interest is the pizza delivery girl...she was seen leaving the restaurant around two am ..she claims that she can't remember a thing...hmmm Marple
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Seachange
8 years ago
Makes sense now. As I was emptying the rubbish every night after Madame's daily soirees, I have seen lik2 cuming out in the ungodly hours from.. Jayme's cabana!!! 😎 I asked him what he was doing there. He meekly replied Jayme was giving his Balls a bit of a workout and for some comfort as there was no Spit in sight. the disappearance of Spit has left him high and dry.
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RHP User
8 years ago
Hmm I'm not that happy about the cook getting to the French tennis coach before I put him through his paces on the casting couch 😠 damn this investigation. They can't prove anything. I'm still denying 😀 French tennis coach mmm love it 😍
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RHP User
8 years ago
No-one rocks more than you xx thank you
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PurePeony
8 years ago
Too many bloody scenes and whilst I love watching bloody and gory movies, I much prefer starring in porno flicks. Sorry... I'm driving off to my next maid assignment... on board a luxury yacht with two horny bachelors who made their millions investing in CFD's and the stock market. With any luck, they might share some of their money-making tips with me too!
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AnnieWhichway
8 years ago
Looks like I'm adopting 2 children. Geesus. More champagne required.
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nibblemebi
8 years ago
That escalated quickly. Time for Super Unicorn to save the day!! I've landed my sparkly Unicopter out in the field for a quick escape for those running to safety from the murderous undesirables. Next stop Pleasure Island, where it's pure pleasure and the only worry you have is who to pick to caress for the day. All meals and entertainment provided as well as the bevy of masseuses for your ultimate relaxation. You're going to need it after your escape! Disclaimer : There are 97, 573 cameras on Pleasure Island, so you may also need to worry about what angle best captures your derriere too 😉 There's no escaping but who'd really want to with such a good helping of daily orgasms! - Posted from rhpmobile
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