M48
Dilemma, Please help ladies.
March 07 2014
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
Sorry should have clarified, At first point of contact I mean intimate point of contact. Some people i.e. (very select) are capable of knowing the difference between NSA or FBw/B Fuck Buddy with Benefits. Which is how all of this topic arose in the first place. Some people are unable to differentiate with what they write/see/hear and what is stirring within or what gets stirred within. People are meaning making machines; we make things mean more than the situation is or reflect and compare previous situations to current moments, i.e. being/living in the present. Their minds make stories and allow their feelings to take over the original intent, in this case pleasure. which is itself a feeling/sensation. It's when they associate blend, bring in other feelings those emotions get the better of them and they tent to want (not need and there is a difference) more. It's a fickle way of seeing things. I think you're quite in tune with who you are and comfortable with your situation. And many of us are. I guess in many ways we're comfortably numb and have the capacity to be so. Others don't for what ever reason (meaning making machine/stories they make up/feelings) they persist in wanting more than is actually being offered. NSA is simply No Strings attached wether it be a once off or multiple catch up. At the end of the day what each of us are here for is pleasure. Regardless if it's a shag or something more. (shag, ongoing, relationship, whatever!!!) People need to be clear and understand, wether you take them home or hotel or dogging or meet at a club. What ever the case. By the way not that I've done it in all of those places!!!! Just my thoughts, Koz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
And not just on RHP either. I hear the same complaint from work colleagues and friends.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
I feel like Bruce Willis in Sixth Sense....... You HAVE seen my comments, OP... right?!You quote/reply everyone else... hahaha And LadyT... go right ahead..... I know you wanna.
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
but you have Ms.Mermaid. Feeling left out are we?? Foxy
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MsSuperFoxy
11 years ago
trying to pull the OP's strings to get him to bite are we? Foxy
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RHP User
11 years ago
I personally think the Sydney siders have this topic covered, Melbourne noted for........ I feel the need; the need for Sydney. Please lay down your choice in weaponry. This chess game may potentially go on forever. Men/ladies; we're all the same, really. It's just our bits- or should I say each others bits that make us different. Theoretically we all have choices. Our profiles give the other person an indication of what we want. Some people are picture orientated, others choose the text and significance within the text. Our Profiles are the original catalyst as to the initial attraction. If a person states NSA, that's what they really need. Should the person looking through the profile not like NSA....... Move on ect...ect...ect.... As mentioned previously, we all love making things mean more than they should. NSA is purely a hot night/nights/day/Afternoon delight on call, when suited for both parties and yes that may include couples. Not that I've been there! This is all a choice, freedom of choice, individual choice, you make a choice and live with the consequences. Wether they be good or bad. Some of mine were bad, hence the topic raised. I've learnt so much from this thread, it's been exceptionally informative. Almost unreal in some regards. I'm particularly impressed with the input and effort. Wow, I could hire several of you in my line of work. Koz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Lady T I think that was a reference to Q being 99 years old. :) fair enough my bad
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'CoolKoz' Gaz, Foxy, Ms Silk, All valid, however have elected to find 1 real wonderful person, that's clever, intelligent, knows what they want and who they are as an individual. Someone that has dead lines to meet during the day pardon the pun!!! That wants to meet regularly for dinner, and other fun activities. So yes; Should any of you know someone on RHP that fit's these selection criterion make the recommendation. And has a sense of humour let them know. the women on rhp are the same women you meet in the street, but they do not play the waiting for pussy game. if you want a relationship, close your profile and go offline, meet a woman try not to fuck her for at least five dates and see how you go this is the cart before the horse town, and women wonder why that cart never goes anyplace except to their bedroom Koz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Quoting 'looking4quality' You need to decide what you are on here for and work out your vetting process from there. It doesn't matter if it's for NSA, a ONS, a FB, a FWB or a long term lover. Just be open and honest about it from the start. (although some people will tell you whatever they think you want to hear just to get into your pants.) Are you talking about the women? That they say they want NSA and then after one or two dates they suddenly tell you there are strings. So I think women are also disingenuous when it comes to dating. The problem I have seen are the needy girls, no offence ladies but the women that say they can handle NSA and they cant. I have seen some very damaged women on this site, some train wrecks who are walking into the same wall day in day out. the lonely, the women that sadly believe if a man sticks his cock in your mouth or other bits of you that he will form an attachment. Over time( if he decides to come back), yes you may get fond of each other, but you need to keep it all in perspective. the difference I have found for me, Is that I am in a very unusual spot as I love my husband and I get all the other stuff from him that everyone needs in life. when you are a person alone, be it a man or a woman, when you start to progress from sex to making love, then strings start to form. Its the nature of humans. however most men on here are not out to make love, they are out to make great sex and to give you that physical zing, or they are out to make great sex for themselves and find lots of willing women who keep falling into the same trap. getting hooked on the unavailable person. This happens to men as well, where they fall for the MYTH of the sexy cyber goddess. that woman that will suck their cock, give them porn sex, invite their girlfriends to join in and get them a beer while they are at it..ohh wait that's me, shit!now where was I? The strings you form are those you make yourself, from twines of lonely .
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'CoolKoz' Gaz, Foxy, Ms Silk, All valid, however have elected to find 1 real wonderful person, that's clever, intelligent, knows what they want and who they are as an individual. Someone that has dead lines to meet during the day pardon the pun!!! That wants to meet regularly for dinner, and other fun activities. So yes; Should any of you know someone on RHP that fit's these selection criterion make the recommendation. And has a sense of humour let them know. Koz. Hi this was on page 5 not sure where all the other text came from in your example. Koz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
those other words were mine,they just came out in the same print as the quote
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RHP User
11 years ago
It looked misleading considering it was in the same text. Koz
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RHP User
11 years ago
Lady T.....strings made out of the same twine as lonely xxQ
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' I feel like Bruce Willis in Sixth Sense....... You HAVE seen my comments, OP... right?!You quote/reply everyone else... hahaha Awww but he doesn't want to root you DG. Clearly.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Meeka if you were here right now!!!!
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
You girls are all replying to him, so it's not stopping you Hahahaha Anyway, I'm starting to think the topic was a platform, not a request for answers
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' You girls are all replying to him, so it's not stopping you Hahahaha Anyway, I'm starting to think the topic was a platform, not a request for answers It certainly got him noticed
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gazpacho
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' You girls are all replying to him, so it's not stopping you Hahahaha Anyway, I'm starting to think the topic was a platform, not a request for answers Let's face facts here, your opinion is being totally ignored! Even I got a mention and I'm way out of his social profile. :) HugsGaz PS... I see.. you need a catchy tag, like mine... except I got dibs on Hugs.. you'll have to try snogs or some such .
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Tags are for clothes, and cows ears.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Well you have to agree, his strategy has worked famously. :)
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RHP User
11 years ago
The Platform is what's got me into trouble. I like treating ladies well, with respect and exceeding their fun factor expectations. Yes I'm here to have fun, no I'm not here to have my space or integrity compromised. Some people within the forum understand the phase I am going through. NSA isn't really who I'm about; however when certain events occur in your life, you need a release and expression of freedom, a way to find your inner you. This was my way of finding my inner Lion. My way of meeting and socialising and meeting the ladies I did. And in 98% of case both the lady and I were happy, Just those 2 cases which have almost been sorted. Many of the people that have commented in on this topic have made great suggestions, I appreciate all efforts. We've all had different experiences. It's the ladies here that have made a significant difference to the way I have changed my screening. And I am looking for that special ongoing experience with a special someone. However, there needs to fire. Fire in the attraction, and yes I'm no Sistine Chapel ( well I don't think I am), Fire in the communication, Fire in the sex and all round stimulation on every level. I'm not saying all the boxes need to be ticked and 10 out of 10. but close would be good. Koz.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Loz, ....if your topic is to be taken at face value, which to be honest.... I do have a little trouble believing....(multiple women thought to leave undies and flowers at your door? Etc?!)....if true, the problem ISNT the phase you're going through..... The problem is a combination of your choice of partners, and your method of communication with them. But as you say you've changed your screening, hopefully you've corrected half of the potential for drama. Hope you work out the other half. Cheers DG
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RHP User
11 years ago
Two cars, huh..? And you can't afford a motel, you say...? Interesting...................... Whilst I have only met one complete and utter froot loop on here... I think your methods of choosing your NSA's may need serious revising...not to mention the words you are using when you do meet because you are CLEARLY GIVING THE WRONG MESSAGE... You must be a real "hottie"....*lucky bugga*...I think? S'nP
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'spicyandpassion' Two cars, huh..? And you can't afford a motel, you say...? Interesting...................... Whilst I have only met one complete and utter froot loop on here... I think your methods of choosing your NSA's may need serious revising...not to mention the words you are using when you do meet because you are CLEARLY GIVING THE WRONG MESSAGE... You must be a real "hottie"....*lucky bugga*...I think? S'nP S&P, I have more than a couple of toys, READ carefully throught the treat before "ASS U ME ing". it's not that I can't afford hotels; I just like clean sheets that 3000 butts haven't slept on and the luxury of being able to have what I want when I want it. I guess that's why they call it a home! As for revising, that's what the whole point of the topic. A friend of mine calls this the sand pit; for bloody good reason. I'm not hot looking, just honest, straight forward and still looking to meet someone for more than NSA or Fw/B. Someone that can give as much as they get, I'm not talking about the bedroom either. Someone intelligent, sexy in their own right. someone that can smile and cry. And we all know ladies cry. You see there's more to my activities, not that I need to explain!!!!! Koz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
what does nsa mean????
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'wo2bloke'what does nsa mean???? No Strings Attached.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Coolkoz, I have been reading your responses on this thread and it seems, you at some point say NSA then again say more than NSA. I have read your profile and even in it you allude to looking for more than just NSA. So pardon me, but maybe these women meet and hope to impress you to get more than just NSA since you say you're open to more and you're caring, honest blah blah blah IMO you sound confused and maybe aren't coming out as clear as you might think you are to these women - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Shazza85' Coolkoz, I have been reading your responses on this thread and it seems, you at some point say NSA then again say more than NSA. I have read your profile and even in it you allude to looking for more than just NSA. So pardon me, but maybe these women meet and hope to impress you to get more than just NSA since you say you're open to more and you're caring, honest blah blah blah IMO you sound confused and maybe aren't coming out as clear as you might think you are to these women Okay, I have recently changed my profile. Yes I was going through a phase where all I wanted was NSA. (several ladies here know why I was going through that phase) I made that exceptionally clear at the time. Both in my profile, During Messaging and the meet that all I wanted was an NSA meet. The major things I did wrong were, Bring them home, Treat them probably better than most have and be hospitable. However now, I do need something more and want something ongoing and I'd like it to develop into something more meaningful. I am completely single. I don't lie, I value my integrity above all the material things in life. So yes this has been good in that, the two in question have probably followed this thread and let it be. And bad in the sense that many people here have taken the view that I'm completely confused, irrational, and a terrible communicator. That's your choice if you feel that way. Koz.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'IllBloUrFnMinds'I just read your post on Chivalry Mischeivouslad. You have got it down my friend! Hi Fives! But there is an irony in your salesmanship posted here while suggesting OP is self promoting? Ooooooh, and it makes me wonder... (ie Led Zep for all you ill informed young ones) Yep, now I know for sure I need to stay away from that chivalry thread
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RHP User
11 years ago
well you managed to get yourself in the shit, , guys need to understand females more, unfortunately some woman feel more comfortable with they sleep with the same fwb .you just need to be careful here because they can begin to trust them and unbeknowingly they start to develop an emotional attachment, then the trouble starts to develop, some woman can't fully let themselves enjoy sex without emotional attachment or being attracted to them unlike men, it comes naturally to have sex without attraction or emotional attachment and this is what the female can't seem to understand, so Coolkoz , id be more careful as to who you select, if you have that trouble all the time then your best bet would be to seek coupls or woman who have single profiles but come from a unconditional marriage, I'm sorry i can't be of any help to your present situation but can offer some advice, just ask cheers
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Another fan lol
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'CoolKoz' The major things I did wrong were, Bring them home, Treat them probably better than most have and be hospitable. There must have been more. More often than not the men I have sex with come to my home. I like to think I treat them pretty well, and no man leaves without a decadent breakfast. I haven't had any problems in the last 18 months I've been here, so I don't think that's where your issue lies. (And don't tell me it's different with women.)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Luckdragon23'now I know for sure I need to stay away from that chivalry thread I was waiting for your rant there, but you may just agree (a little) with my answer.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'CoolKoz' Okay, I have recently changed my profile. ... I do need something more and want something ongoing and I'd like it to develop into something more meaningful. You're profile reads like that to me. Hope it works out!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'wo2bloke' what does nsa mean???? No strings attached. No expectations, no commitment, not an exclusive arrangement that is you both often continue to see other people.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Quoting 'CoolKoz' The major things I did wrong were, Bring them home, Treat them probably better than most have and be hospitable. There must have been more. More often than not the men I have sex with come to my home. I like to think I treat them pretty well, and no man leaves without a decadent breakfast. I haven't had any problems in the last 18 months I've been here, so I don't think that's where your issue lies. (And don't tell me it's different with women.) Meander, I believe there is a slight difference though; not that it really matters anymore!!!I feel ladies of a particular age especially can get more attached. the same with men of a particular age!!! Everyone develops and matures differently. Koz.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Quoting 'CoolKoz' Meander, I believe there is a slight difference though; not that it really matters anymore!!! Koz... it doesnt matter with the two (or more?!) women that encouraged you to write this topic. But unless you plan on becoming an abstinent monk, unless the lessons are learned and advice taken on board... you will repeat the history that created the problems.
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Quoting 'CoolKoz' Meander, I believe there is a slight difference though; not that it really matters anymore!!! Koz... it doesnt matter with the two (or more?!) women that encouraged you to write this topic. But unless you plan on becoming an abstinent monk, unless the lessons are learned and advice taken on board... you will repeat the history that created the problems. You obviously haven't read through the thread; either that; or you you enjoy stirring the pot. Or quite possibly your just plan old ..........!!!! read through the thread prior to writing excrement.
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Seachange
11 years ago
Hi CK I feel for you if your story is true. Wow two stalkers! Then them leaving panties and roses. Weill they must be loaded or are spending their kids' allowance on the laces (not cheap to look sexy - surely they wont leave the Bridget Jones big mama undies - and roses (unless they pick the old ladies' roses next door). I dont see anything wrong with treating them nicely on the night, a bit of wine and food (very civilized) and some great conversation to relax them before the DEED. All good. However, nobody deserves to be stalked if you were clear to them from the outset that all you wanted was a bonk for the night. Hey, if it works both ways and both are happy with the cards on the table, bonk away. I read most of the thread (geeez, sure did stir the pot) and the underlying theme is present, your screening process, profile, blah, blah, blah then I just had a read of your profile and the component that can be misleading is this: ", looking for ongoing Friend with Benefits with a special individual. I'm clean, fit, look after myself and creative. I enjoy getting to know people prior to taking things further" I dont know about you but this just sends mix messages, like the ongoing FWB and then the last line. If read by someone who is mentally and emotionally vulnerable (or desperate), they can be misconstrued as something more than the ONS. Be careful. Change is straight away so you can avoid being the stalker magnet. I get a few men sending me messages even after I have said NO, not interested. Blocked them and then they resurrect in another profile and messge me again. Holy cow. Talk about Asian fetish..... Good luck and no need to move to Sydney! Statistically, the probability of getting your share of stalkers there is higher than Melb. Some strategic plan to put in place before AVO kicks in....1)Just run an electric fence around your perimeter (you seem strong enough)2) dig a small moat with stalker detention (biometric tech is here) and lower the drawbridge for family and friends. Hehe.3) Invest in mean looking 3-headed mongrel that only obeys your command to stop snapping at anybody's bum. A deterrent indeed. Have same dog wait outside your bedroom door chomping on a bleeding 5 pound steak, while bonking to make sure they get the idea that he isnt just for display. 4) Profile change (hey maybe this should be 1)5) file AVO process and wait. 6) cant think of more for now, as so early on Sat morning and just so busy snipping of tags on new lacies to distribute tonight, packing bags of 8 candles and picking the petals off these roses I stole from the lady next door.... ooops. There will always be crazies everywhere, men or women, within or beyond the horny walls of RHP. Have a safe journey navigating thru all the crazies.... ;)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Hi, It was definitely an interesting couple of weeks, However you made reference to my profile... Since this event I've changed my profile to it's current status. I guess these incidents, to put it quite frankly; pushed me to my boundaries of comfort. When finding such items, especially notes at my door and in the letter box. I've been taking a bit of a break, and I'm looking for something stable and ongoing. Thanks for your post though and the tips. Koz.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
Dont some egos get all brittle when tapped lightly by a guy. Koz... the comment you seem to have taken as such a challenge....was actually no different to those made by women. But in your haste to preserve yourself and your re-branded image in here... you missed that. Good luck.I hope you HAVE learned the lessons and the issues that caused this topic, dont repeat themselves. DG
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Dont some egos get all brittle when tapped lightly by a guy. Koz... the comment you seem to have taken as such a challenge....was actually no different to those made by women. But in your haste to preserve yourself and your re-branded image in here... you missed that. Good luck.I hope you HAVE learned the lessons and the issues that caused this topic, dont repeat themselves. DG Firstly it takes more than someone's comments to offend. For the are only words, words that aren't true. Secondly, if your were as creative as your profile suggests!!! You would not be repeating well after the fact what so many others have, when you have already commented on the thread. Lastly, I feel your envy through the thread in attempting to mock throughout. Sounds like you're not getting enough.Maybe you are the person least likely to be on RHP; for a reason!!! As your profile suggests. As stated throughout the thread, in case your incapable of logically running through in a orderly manner.I understood that bringing them home and probably treating the ladies better than most was an issue.I had told them all I wanted was NSA, I have recently changed my profile as NSA is no longer what I'm after.It quite obvious that with chaps like you here, people like me; with integrity do well. Koz
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'CoolKoz' Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Dont some egos get all brittle when tapped lightly by a guy. Koz... the comment you seem to have taken as such a challenge....was actually no different to those made by women. But in your haste to preserve yourself and your re-branded image in here... you missed that. Good luck.I hope you HAVE learned the lessons and the issues that caused this topic, dont repeat themselves. DG Firstly it takes more than someone's comments to offend. For the are only words, words that aren't true. Secondly, if your were as creative as your profile suggests!!! You would not be repeating well after the fact what so many others have, when you have already commented on the thread. Lastly, I feel your envy through the thread in attempting to mock throughout. Sounds like you're not getting enough.Maybe you are the person least likely to be on RHP; for a reason!!! As your profile suggests. As stated throughout the thread, in case your incapable of logically running through in a orderly manner.I understood that bringing them home and probably treating the ladies better than most was an issue.I had told them all I wanted was NSA, I have recently changed my profile as NSA is no longer what I'm after.It quite obvious that with chaps like you here, people like me; with integrity do well. Koz Your over the top responses to DG, and your personal slurs towards him, are not showing a man of integrity.
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Mischeviouslad
11 years ago
....
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RHP User
11 years ago
You talk a good game CoolKos but it seems you've let the ball drop with regards to Mischeviouslad throughout this thread ... in such a way that could be seen to be inadvertently discrediting your integrity - not his ... jus sayn.
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just_Adam
11 years ago
damn, rich people problems... um, stop being so fucking awesome?
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RHP User
11 years ago
hi i read your message about being stalked by women youve slept with and i think your first mistake is to take them straight bACK TO YOUR HOME.IF YOU SLEEP WITH A WOMAN THEY ARE GOING TO THINK YOUR INTERESTED IN them..im not suggesting that this is an invitation to stalk someone..just maybe be very clear from the start you say you love to shag butmaybe communication is the key here..and go toa hotel rather than sex at your home and giving away all your private details..i have experienced stalking by an ex an dit went on for 4 years even after police invilvement. its terrible and very distressing i just couldnt get him to leave me alone and then the police said to me hed done it before..its about power and control...so keep your address private until your sure of the ladies your meeting.maybe spend more time getting to know them rather than just leaping into bed... be very clear in what you want and although you may say your just after sex,remember that women sometimes want more especially after sexual encounters so be good at communicating what you expect out of the situation.
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madotara69
11 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' Loz, ....if your topic is to be taken at face value, which to be honest.... I do have a little trouble believing....(multiple women thought to leave undies and flowers at your door? Etc?!)....if true, the problem ISNT the phase you're going through..... The problem is a combination of your choice of partners, and your method of communication with them. But as you say you've changed your screening, hopefully you've corrected half of the potential for drama. Hope you work out the other half. Cheers DG To Piggy, Pete Morgan, women tossing their underwear at him, Though he was an Aztec, a Rock n Roll legend. They (the ladies) loooooved him impulsively. Mado Mado Tara xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Just accept that part of you may be an arsehole man and that you probably, albeit potentially subconsciously, lead them on coz you like the attention, the intimate attention obviously more so than the sex - evident in the fact you're now seeking 'the one'. Chicks dig arseholes don't they? Probably why they're going nuts over you haha I don't think you're an arsehole BTW, you've obviously took it on the chin that you probably f'd up, so high fives for that. Good luck mate - be more aware or smarter... either way
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