M57
The Ugly, the Fat, and the Whingers,
May 07 2015
Comments
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RHP User
10 years ago
Very easy to have opinions and see the fault in others.The truth is that you don't know anybodies path, where they have been or what they are dealing with. In my opinion, live and let live......you can choose who YOU relate with and you can judge for yourself (we all do all the time, and can't be helped). But to take it out and make observations and say who is right and who is not is not very cool. We are all in our own journeys, we are all doing the very best we can. And that is where we are in this moment. Unfortunately we can not help people, we can inspire by our own awareness, but that is about it. I think it is much more interesting to look and work on our own stuff that looking outside !!! Travel well
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RHP User
10 years ago
1......nup, can't do it.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Should I assume BM you are having a go at me and my recent post? If you are then that's more than a little unkind and a little unfair.
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RHP User
10 years ago
You do realise how ironic this posts is.its very ugly.and you are whinging about whinging.pffft.
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RHP User
10 years ago
No, I only pop in and read a few random threads so I am unaware of what thread you are talking about. It was prompted by the bail 2 girls thread and some whinging by others in various thread And Yes I realize the irony but I am looking for the silver lining
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RHP User
10 years ago
.... because I am an eternal optimist! LG
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
Hes been a bit "clever"... crafting a topic that makes anyone offering anything critical of it or the obvious agenda..... as one of the ugly people. eeniemeeniemineymo..... A beautiful person...... is a giver.they give attention, they give focus, they give time.... and they give it freely. And all of that has zero to do with their height, weight, attractiveness, age, culture, intelligence, physical ability, only child, middle child, gender dietary preferences or even what side of the bed they sleep on. DG
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RHP User
10 years ago
Not always, and you yelling that it is makes your post ugly to me. I suggest you educate yourself instead of complaining about complainers.
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RHP User
10 years ago
I'm beautiful because I stand up for people being judged harshly by others. ;-)
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RHP User
10 years ago
Such a subjective thing..some think so..I think that I am a compassionate person,I have respect for all life..I don't kill inconvenient creatures...they too are here for a purpose..xxFreya
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RHP User
10 years ago
I am a funny fucker and make people smile and that makes me smile as well. I am gorgeous cause, cause I like myself , faults and all (yes you may all gasp in horror , i do have a few) I do however think that people get shit thrown at them over and over again, and they are too exhausted to put their arms up to defend themselves, so they wear a shit coat at times. People whine for a range of reasons, its just a way to ease tension. The critisise others because we are a tribe and that is how we measure each other up and find a spot in the tribe. We are not saints here We have fat days, and mean days, and funny days and sexy days we are human. well most of you are, some days we beat ourselves up, other days the world gives us a black eye. When we get that we may just see things a little skewered. And your post is valid, people often put up posts here in disguise when they are taking a shot. I have down it myself quiet a few times. However if you take a swipe at my mate Freya, I will curry your testicles and feed them to my dog, then you might just have a bit of a high pitched whine yourself Me I am a cyber goddess
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RHP User
10 years ago
It is all about respect not making judgement. I am with you Freya I kill nothing everything has a right to life and as you say a purpose. Going out of your way for people in need is also easy. You only have to look at yourself see how good you actually have it and realise we are so bloody lucky. Even if we feel shit and things are down there is someone that is suffering so much more. Be grateful for what we have, for me it is that simple.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' I'm beautiful because I stand up for people being judged harshly by others. ;-) Stand up that is - your profile pic is Yum just the way it is!
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RHP User
10 years ago
long fat juicy ones, Short thin scary ones, Cos nobody loves me...... Except me 😊 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Interesting. Beautiful Freya. I did not write this with any intention of making a snip at you, I am actually somewhat puzzled as to what you said to make you think I was directing this post at you. I always saw you as a "What can I do for the world?" type person rather than a "What should the world do for me?" type, the types this post is trying to make a point to. Apart from that there is no surprises in this thread Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, as the saying goes. But that misses what I consider the most vital component of beauty. Beauty must radiate via thought and action. There is no point in having the perfect figure when the personality is wanton, critical, and judgmental. That is ugly and nothing can hide that stain, no amount of perfection can cover the active and deliberate disdain of others. The same goes for people that are overweight. I can not see beauty when that person attacks society for not conforming to their needs. There is no beauty in defensive reactionary guilt throwing and shaming. There is no beauty if it needs constant appraisal, comparison, and elevation. If you can not be happy in your self that is something you should work at, it is not the fault of society. Why make your weight ugly by projecting hate. Some of the most beautiful people I know and love are not what anyone would consider classically beautiful. They are realists, they are pragmatic, and they are non judgmental of both others and them selves. And oh they are sexy. InTheKiss, you have met my friend some time back in Freo and will know that she does not conform to the classical ideal of beauty. Yet to me she is a stunner, the most beautiful women I have ever be lucky enough to meet. In all the time I have known her there has never once been a complaint about her self or of others in regard to her looks. She is outrageously flamboyant (you saw her in her most conservative mode). When we go out there is a constant stream of compliments from complete strangers that even the most classical of beauty does not attract. She does not cower behind a shield of angry fat. She is what beauty is. Yes we have fat days and a host of other days, but it is more of where that is projected. Whinge at ones self is so much better than whinging at others. I am a skinny guy, sometimes I bulk up, so i have had both the weedy, and the fat days, and currently having a very bad hair day. I do not project that onto others and blame my perceived inadequacies on their supposed anti me standards. Thanks for your, as always insightful post. BTW curried steel does not make for good dog food.. ;) Meander. Fat is not always a choice but for 99% of overweight people it is. I can back that up with researched, referenced fact. Overwhelmingly being over weight is an active process where the blame is entirely the individual, I personally do not look at people in regard to weight, but when I see a person blame others for not conforming to their own personal ideals, all I can see is gross. it is doubly so when its life style choice that is the progenitor of that hate. NoFuzz. I am not here to be cool. I am in your face, crass, and pig dog ugly when it comes to debate. I wrote delicately but with a directed agenda. I was hoping a long list of beautiful smiley comments would result from the mud I flung, alas it is not so. SirStir. Worms make a good meal.. Leo_girl, InTheKiss, TisonlyI, Freya thanks for showing me your beauty. :) Littlewings. False modesty is not always beautiful, you should blurt out what make you beautiful, give it a try, see how it feels. It will surprise you how many will agree.
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RHP User
10 years ago
As long as you don't eat them little f**kers cos then your belly might feel very ugly
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
Blindman..... you talk about beauty of actions...... but I find elements of your reply condescending, and patronising. To me.... that is ugly.
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RHP User
10 years ago
hmmm " Fat is not always a choice but for 99% of overweight people it is. I can back that up with researched, referenced fact." please do...I love references so please do not hold back. I am that 1% where having fat and extra weight is not related to choice and I am not lazy either Looking forward to seeing OP at the finish line at my next triathlon
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Blindman67'Overwhelmingly being over weight is an active process where the blame is entirely the individual and ignores a number of wider influences on health (including weight / obesity) in our society, many of which are outside the control of the individual. It's now common knowledge in public health that focusing solely on individual behaviour change can only work up to a point. Google 'social determinants of health'.
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RHP User
10 years ago
I got the trifecta
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'GypsyWildNT' As long as you don't eat them little f**kers cos then your belly might feel very ugly If you put them in moist wheatgerm they can purge the soil and then they taste better
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RHP User
10 years ago
with some roast chicken seasoning; a few mixed herbs and them lightly sautéed in butter... They're so yum!!! 😝 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
i ain't skinny; I'm a bit rounded; and I do only have myself to blame. I'm lazy. I'm too lazy to get organised on the weekend and portion out my snacks for the week and stock up on fresh fruit and Veges, nuts, yoghurt etc. And yes...I pay the ultimate price for eating maccas wayyyyy too much... Will I change?? Absolutely. Because I have a need to change. I don't just desire it, but I need to. However..... What other people do is their business. If they're happy within themselves and it shows through; then I say who cares?? 😊 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Adding to what Luck_Dragon has said. Weight is incredibly complicated - even 'simply' physiologicially there are numerous factors including epigenetics, changes to self-control centre, changes to gastric nerves, changes to gut flora ... Before we even get to behavioural, social, psychological.... So I'm not sure what you're currently reading Blindman. But for a peer reviewed reference, International Journal of Obesity (doi:10.1038/ijo.2013.138) might be worthy of a lil ole look see.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Luck Dragon. That sounds too much like blame throwing. We could just sit around and accept that we have no part in what we are, fat, smokers, drinkers, violent criminals, and more. We should take every opportunity to find reason not to blame ourselves for if we search there can always be cause beyond our self. We are all now free of blame and are left only with the need to find those responsible and make them suffer the guilt of making one hate them. Sarcasm aside. We must at some point take responsibility for who we are. There are many ways to lose weight, there are many reasons to lose weight. Besides this is not about being fat or not, its about being happy and projecting that onto the world, this is about being beautiful via understanding and acceptance. No one will ever change the way society judges beauty so its time to act like the fit skinny and physically ugly people do, accept and understand, don't blame.
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RHP User
10 years ago
HennaJay One can say the same for smokers, drinkers, drink drivers, violent abusive criminals. No end of reason for that type of behavior can be found, socioeconomic, genetic, trauma both physically and emotionally. Yet we seem more than happy to throw the blame back at them saying its a life style choice. Reality is what it is despite our attempts at manipulating it, the above "life style" choices are as much a choice as being fat. Its how one choices to live ones life, or should we just give up and indulge for its is really beyond our capacity to control.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Not buying the fact this forum is only about whingers and blamers and you have nothing against overweight people in general. If that were true you would have not specifically mentioned them in your profile title. Since you've not taken a single thing anyone has said on board, I'll leave you to it as responding further will be pointless. Peace out.
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RHP User
10 years ago
I choose to be xx
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RHP User
10 years ago
I'm handsome cos I drink, smoke, am overweight and couldn't really give two fucks what anyone thinks about my poor lifestyle choices. So long as I'm happy I couldn't care less about society.
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RHP User
10 years ago
I should have been more clear. My earlier post was particularly in relation to what you said: "Fat is not always a choice but for 99% of overweight people it is. I can back that up with researched, referenced fact." When I have looked into similar'facts, references, and research', I've come up with a different position than: "Overwhelmingly being over weight is an active process where the blame is entirely the individual" Surely there is a certain beauty in delving and seeking, and being open to new pieces of information and ideas - even new sources of information. And "we blame" ... doesn't include me. I'm more interested in what happens below the surface, and when I have a mind to*, prefer to look at the myriad of things that make life and people so endearingly complex. That to me is a thing of beauty
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Blindman67'.... I am not here to be cool. I am in your face, crass, and pig dog ugly when it comes to debate. I wrote delicately but with a directed agenda. I was hoping a long list of beautiful smiley comments would result from the mud I flung, alas it is not so. One of the things I think makes me beautiful is I'm always willing to give others the benefit of the doubt; to assume the best of people until they prove otherwise. I find the stated agenda very hard to believe, but would like to assume you weren't really trying to start an ugly debate (pun intended). It would be easier to assume no ill will, had you not also said that "there is no surprises in this thread", which would imply that if not intended, the result certainly isn't unexpected. And of course there's no chance anything as provocative as the second paragraph in the OP would result in pages of smiley comments. It could be an honest miscalculation though, I guess we shall see.
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RHP User
10 years ago
is ugly...really ugly in my eyes.. I dont care if the man is bold, or has full hair or whether his chest is shaved or furry like a jumper, I dont care whether is package is small or big (as long as it clean) etc...but please...do not approach me if you are 1, shallow 2, stupid 3, deny science and reason
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Missb4u
10 years ago
i am all of those things at different times, the fat, the ugly and the whinger... What makes me beautiful is my open mind - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
SimonDoes Food for thought is all I present, I have not directed this at anyone, any group, or any gender. For some time I have been reluctantly biting my tongue over the persistent shaming of those that express their personal tastes. It seem that here in these forums fat is a swear word. I happen to like fat but I am not at all into the ideal that everyone is beautiful because they demand it so. To tell me what to think is a red flag to a bull and I cant just sit and read. Yes I knew who would say what, some I was not to sure about. I am using the word fat as much as I can, not to shame, not to insult. I use it to diminish its power, to some it is a tool of manipulation, to others its a crutch for sympathy, and to way to many it has saddly become an insult. I do not find such things as positive influences on those that do not fit the ideal. I have not once called fat ugly, never have never will. I call out the ugly with words they wish to own and I call on those that are fat to be beautiful. HennaJay I am very open to new information, I am an info junky. Yet for this subject I will leave it at what you say for we delve into the world of subjective ambiguity. The various social sciences are barely above pseudoscience and are based as much on personal opinion as experimental fact. Without a system to determine fact we but play subjective hop scotch that has no possibility of conclusion. I am a humanist, a determinist, and a scientist. I am beautiful because I care, not particularly for each and every soul, but for us as a whole. I am beautiful because I believe that is what luck gave me, not because that is what I am told. I am beautiful because I am diligent, precise, and without faith (by without faith I mean question everything). ******** What gets me is how many automatically make the word fat an insult. Why perpetuate that insidious underhanded malice? Why must it have an excuse?
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RHP User
10 years ago
Yes that was a lovely day. Your friend is lovely and smart as a whip just like you are. I have to smile as I know a lot of people, and what we post on here is not who we are, its just our thoughts on a particular topic and on a particular day. I think most of you guys will get on like a house on fire over a dinner party. I go to meet and greets all over the country and think pity you guys cant all meet, as you have more in common than you do differences. and beauty is in the eye of the beer holder , well it is down at Murphys pub in Mandurah hope to catch up again sometime BM
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RHP User
10 years ago
My father in law who was by the way a prisoner of war, said to me have you ever seen a fat person in a concentration camp? I had to think about that one. the answer is no. However food is more than something you shove down your throat. We eat for a whole range of reasons, if its in reach and its not good food, and we do not have exercise then we are all gonna get fat. Poor folk cannot afford descent food, so they can feed a family cheaper on junk food People with trauma, especially sexual assaults often put on the fat as sort of suit of armor people stop shoving food in their mouth and become anorexic , again due to some trigger or of late dna stuff going on there. food glorious food, is to available to us all in all the wrong forms. do the math, to much in and not enough out , we can all get over weight but as simple and yet that complicated,.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Never heard someone call physiology subjective, ambiguous and a social science pseudoscience, before. Guess there are different #teamsciences then. Not sure what sources you trust, if you are dismissive of peer reviewed journal articles. But hey ...as you say, you're the scientist and I'm just a hack without any labels. Maybe there is beauty if being flawed.
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RHP User
10 years ago
HennaJay Close to pseudo, a step up as there is a requirement for some sort of experimental evidence, the problem being of course that humans are not and should not be guinea pigs. The ethical constraints do lead to assumption and subjective analysis, I was married to a psychologist and they are totally nuts. You can find a paper to back up almost any claim in regard to humanity. Flaws beautiful maybe??? undoubtedly... Me I am so flawed its a wonder I can stay whole, and not in the best ways. Though its the imperfections that makes one interesting, and interesting is an alluring beauty all of its own. InTheKiss Glad you broached the POW, both my parent where imprisoned during the war, my mum as a child, my dad as a late teen. What they had to endure makes our lives positively luxurious. Yet we still suffer in our ways. Oh for a perfect life... I have another bout of holidays soon and will have to make my way down your way.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Why are you talking about psychology... My commentary was about physiology.. It's about as science'y and reductionist as it gets But I'll agree it's flawed. Damn ethics boffins won't let the scientists assign people gender, age, genetics...
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RHP User
10 years ago
Why are you talking about psychology... My commentary was about physiology.. It's about as science'y and reductionist as it gets But I'll agree it's flawed. Damn ethics boffins won't let the scientists assign people gender, age, genetics...
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RHP User
10 years ago
Now his comment to this post...THAT is beautiful. Non judgmental attitude. I'll find things and people in this world that I love. Who cares about negativity, Ill focus on positive and it will find me. I bet fuzz man is living life and making memorable experiences. Go honest, forgiving, beautiful people!
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RHP User
10 years ago
... to be a keyboard warrior.
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
I agree but i would not have used one of his examples. i dont have an issue with people complaining about their ailments and disabilties when its beyond their control. But to hear people bang on about something that they can control if they have the desire to, or at least try. Being happy with the way you are, that's what is important. If you are not happy and can do something about it then do it to make yourself happy. If you are not happy about yourself and cannot change it, i will happily listen and support you. And try and help you be happy.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Blindman. Says it all in your name. Leave the over weight people alone. What an ugly thing to say - Posted from rhpmobile
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inspirit
10 years ago
As the OP said in his last paragraph WESTERN society frowns upon unhealthy life style choices. We are just so unacceptable. Oh the irony of it all. Just do not preach to me how I "should" be living my life.
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RHP User
10 years ago
HennaJay Was not talking about psychology. It was just an example of the humanities, of which I assumed we were talking about. We are not talking about diseases and biological dysfunction. Those people will get all the help that the health system can provide. With help the very first advice they are given, reduce intake, increase exercise. There is much debate as to the actual causal relationship that many of the biological mechanisms have on weight gain and how weight gain can lead to disease that in turn makes it more difficult to lose weight. The predominate cause is individual eating and exercise habits (life style factors) Yet I have never heard of anyone starving to death while putting on weight, though that may happen, it would be exceedingly rare. Obesity is the leading cause of preventable death in the western world. This is the important part, "preventable" why call it preventable? The leading causes of weight gain in the western world are excessive dietary intake and lack of exercise. Associated environmental factors have a huge impact on the rates of obesity, these include decrease in the cost of transportation and transport infrastructure. Increased agricultural / processing / and food production energy densities. Increased food advertising, particularly high energy easily digested so called fast foods. Increase in the number of people moving out of poverty into the lower strata of the socioeconomic population. Where you are born, and if your parents or siblings are overweight (important; this is not due to genetic reasons, rather people tend to adopt family behaviour and life style choices) Though environmental factors can appear to have a direct effect on weight gain, to blame the increased world wide living standards as the cause of weight gain is not addressing how the individual's choice of diet and life style contributes to obesity. Then there is the genetic component with a set of genes associated with weight gain. People with two copies of the gene (FTO gene) are on average 3-4kg heavier and are about 1.5 times more likely to become obese during their life. When you consider that against environment factors having the genes has less effect on weight than owning a car or living in a western country. There are some very rare genetic disorders that cause weight gain, but that is just one of many problems associated with the genes that pass them on. and too rare to bother with here. Then there are psychiatric disorders, such as night eating, binge eating, and various other eating disorders. Again these are rare but can be effectively treated if diagnosed. Not sure if it was you or another that mentioned the other genetic inheritance method (forgotten the name) when proteins stay attached to genes and are pass to the offspring. This is very poorly understood and of what is known there is only very slight increase or decrease in the likelihood of obesity, though the exact causal link is not known. Of all the above that can not be directly controlled by the individual, are the eating disorders, with approximately 2-3% of westerners suffering from some form of eating disorders. Of that only a small fraction result in excessive weight gain, with anorexia and bulimia being the most common eating disorders. Even if you where to isolate the individual demographic groups that are most susceptible to the eating disorders that cause weight gain you would still struggle to find 1 in 100 that can attribute their weight gain on the mental illness. Again I like some fat on a person, though there is a point where concern overrides aesthetics. If you (not at you HennaJay) do not like being over weight but find it difficult to impossible to get the weight down then consider seeing your GP as they have very effective treatments and can provide references to specialists that can also help. There are very few people that have no options toward weight loss if that is what you desire. Personally if its not effecting you health, embrace you self as you are beautiful. Be proud to be fat, be proud to be you.
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Twisted_Mister
10 years ago
Is definitely in the eye of the beholder. I have a head that could be compared to a half eaten pie thrown out of a ute going at 100kph (in my view anyway). I drink and smoke, and between feet, ankle, hamstring and lower back injuries/surgery have been significantly injured now for over a year. However, I'm the same weight now as I was when I was 18. I refuse to whinge about one shit thing happening after another. But - my son loves me. And that's enough. And that's beauty. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
lost your number , but you have my email just let me know when and we can catch up cheers
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' As the OP said in his last paragraph WESTERN society frowns upon unhealthy life style choices. We are just so unacceptable. Oh the irony of it all. Just do not preach to me how I "should" be living my life. farrrrking scrumptious , and funny as fuck
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chevtrek
10 years ago
Due to greed and sales to many items contain fat and sugarand even now Mcdonalds is the worst.If one chooses to eat crap just because of advertising thenthey have made the choice.I agree with Blindman if you make that choice and your fat or un healthy then don't bitch.
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
I guess we come to the point of asking..... Blindman.... what defines a person as qualifying as "fat"... to you? And yes... I will openly state that I have a clear purpose in asking this, and I will even give you ammunition to frame your response. * you have no clear photos (except for a couple of dicks and a stomach in the Redhot gallery).... so.... I can't comment on your own bodyshape/bodyweight relative to others. * others may look at you and consider you "fatter" than they.... are. * Would they read this topic, being less "fat" than you... and consider this topic is merely one of the fat ugly whinge rants you are complaining about?! Relativity and perspective can both be very interesting things. DG
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RHP User
10 years ago
What about all the stopid people? God this is a crack up.... I mean I am sure it would be if I could be bothered to read any of this. Haha.
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chevtrek
10 years ago
As I am shopping I have watched the crap people load into there trolleyslike a dozen 2 litre coke/V/Red bull.Some by for them but some buy for there children and reality is unless your real stupid you have to know it will damage your health or yourchildren's.I think this is what Blindman might mean
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inspirit
10 years ago
................ and it is the same shit just worded differently.
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
But nah.....
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inspirit
10 years ago
I dare ya.
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
2 to choose from then....... (Insert shy yellow face here)
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
Dont you hate that, when you post in the wrong thread!!!
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RHP User
10 years ago
What are you choosing? A Big Mac or a tofu burger (eww!). Lol
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inspirit
10 years ago
You had O'deed on chocolate Any..
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Jack_Denials' Quoting 'GypsyWildNT' As long as you don't eat them little f**kers cos then your belly might feel very ugly If you put them in moist wheatgerm they can purge the soil and then they taste better But will they help me be beautiful??????
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RHP User
10 years ago
What makes me beautiful? I have compassion for people. I have confidence, sometimes even in my own skin. I love to learn and I see the amazing things in people that others do not see. In response to being overweight is a choice: There are a huge number of people who work so hard at the gym, try to eat what they are told will make them lose weight (which is often a crock) and they do so in vain. With my compassion for how people "show up" in this world, I understand that a person can have a background so horrific that choices, and this isn't a weight issue, rather than a trauma issue or a socio economic issue, are difficult to have. Sure lots of people do overcome a horrible upbringing, a traumatised childhood and being grown around dysfunction that is normal and SOME manage to get out of it- but many don't. So I don't judge people as inherently flawed because of how they currently show up. They are trying to get by as best they can with the tools they have.
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
More a sausage sort of girl. Anywhichway.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Any_Whichway' More a sausage sort of girl. Anywhichway. Oh I can never say No to a fat juicy Kransky sausage. Yummo
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PL1963
10 years ago
is 75yrs old, large, but was gettin' things under control. Went to hospital for a knee replacement, 2 1/2yrs of golden staaf & many surgeries later, almost died once. He is now very "Big" & they're gunna' cut his leg off in a wk. I've met a lot of "pretty, skinny" ppl, most I wouldn't "piss on if they were on fire", because of their attitudes. My mate is 1 of the nicest, most hospitable ppl I've ever met. Am I gunna' stop associating with him cause he's "Fat" & lost 1 leg? I think not. Cheers P.L.
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
Do you warm the sausage first? or you a daredevil, straight from the fridge?
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Any_Whichway' Do you warm the sausage first? or you a daredevil, straight from the fridge? Who cold kransky... hmm. I am allowed to dip in sauce before I deep throat it?
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RHP User
10 years ago
I whinge when I "Have" a fat.. ...............If no ones to deal with it that is ; ) bahahahahahar.. Lets have a sook about people having a sook..
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PL1963
10 years ago
What happens if you get a "Wide On" & there's nobody to help you with it. Do you guys get shitty? But I guess you ladies usually have somebody that can help out? Cheers P.L.
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RHP User
10 years ago
And so what if there are people who are either fat or whining (or both)? And YOU think it makes them ugly? When I hear someone whining, the first thing I do is listen. Because a person whines because they feel that they have been unjustly treated. I listen to their complaint and then I ask them how they would like to see it solved... And then I ask them how it can be realistically achieved. And yes, fat... Ugly... Whining.. People I have never known have become staunch friends who, yes, who still bitch and whine but then move on and generate their own solutions. I am proud of my friends and I look forward to making new ones every day. I've read your post, I've heard your complaint.... Now, how would you like to see it resolved? Spicy :-D
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'mangocouple' Blindman. Says it all in your name. Leave the over weight people alone. What an ugly thing to say - Posted from rhpmobile Oh that is funny... LOL.. but one gets the feeling the blind one is you as you have not read or understood what I am saying. To quote my self."None of these things (being fat) actually make you ugly, being ugly is entirely your own choice." Why should i leave the fat people alone, do they have some special right, is it only the skinny people that may stripped bare. Being overweight does not make you immune from critique.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'inspirit' As the OP said in his last paragraph WESTERN society frowns upon unhealthy life style choices. We are just so unacceptable. Oh the irony of it all. Just do not preach to me how I "should" be living my life. Love it, irony on irony. Beautiful, but my preaching days are far from over. It is entirely the individual's choice to listen.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'passionNSpice' And so what if there are people who are either fat or whining (or both)? And YOU think it makes them ugly? ..... I've read your post, I've heard your complaint.... Now, how would you like to see it resolved? Spicy :-D To answer you questions. 1;Yes so what, so why should I care? Guess i feel offended when blamed for the unhappiness of others. Blamed for no other reason than being human and part of this culture. 2;Yes I do, when the whining is directed to me, when the misplaced blame is mine, yes I think they are ugly. 3;There is no resolution, this is discussion and debate, nothing more.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'likes2Bwatched' What makes me beautiful? I have compassion for people. I have confidence, sometimes even in my own skin. I love to learn and I see the amazing things in people that others do not see. In response to being overweight is a choice: There are a huge number of people who work so hard at the gym, try to eat what they are told will make them lose weight (which is often a crock) and they do so in vain. With my compassion for how people "show up" in this world, I understand that a person can have a background so horrific that choices, and this isn't a weight issue, rather than a trauma issue or a socio economic issue, are difficult to have. Sure lots of people do overcome a horrible upbringing, a traumatised childhood and being grown around dysfunction that is normal and SOME manage to get out of it- but many don't. So I don't judge people as inherently flawed because of how they currently show up. They are trying to get by as best they can with the tools they have. Compassion is a wonderful thing a most beautiful quality you have. It is very sad that a minority of us must deal with the traumas of life. Though there is an admirable quality in those that can move on past, and something not so in those that use their trauma to throw guilt and elicit pity, not for recovery, but merely for personal gain.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Mischeviouslad' I guess we come to the point of asking..... Blindman.... what defines a person as qualifying as "fat"... to you? And yes... I will openly state that I have a clear purpose in asking this, and I will even give you ammunition to frame your response. * you have no clear photos (except for a couple of dicks and a stomach in the Redhot gallery).... so.... I can't comment on your own bodyshape/bodyweight relative to others. * others may look at you and consider you "fatter" than they.... are. * Would they read this topic, being less "fat" than you... and consider this topic is merely one of the fat ugly whinge rants you are complaining about?! Relativity and perspective can both be very interesting things. DG Guess you don't read. Personally I do not consider weight at all when I meet people. If you actually knew me you would understand how little I care about a persons outward appearance and how much I value their inner being. I will leave the quantifying of fat and thin up to the people whose job it is to care. The medical profession, not the media, Hollywood, or the fashion industry. Most of all not you or I as we are unqualified to make such a call. Though I do know that the term is obese, not fat when it comes to defining unhealthy weight, Though that is not set in stone as the WHO (World Health Organisation) seem to have a habit of moving the standard. In-fact the media was alarmingly eager to report the massive hike in obesity. June 17 1998 and the media went a little crazy over the so called "Weight epidemic" Literally millions of people around the world had become fat or obese. The media cared little about the fact that it happened over night, they cared little about the truth that all that had changed was the natural movement of the BMI in the light of new information regarding health issues associated with carrying extra weight. The ongoing media concern over the increasing weight of humanity was sparked by nothing more than the changing of one number in a classification system. The BMI is not a aesthetic guide, it has proven to be and reliable method for determining risk and future health problems. nothing more. In regard to that fat, obese, or underweight, are medical terms with specific meaning. Being fat is a medical definition, it in no way at all defines any quality of beauty. That is up to you. The media is a prime example of the type of ugly i am talking about. They tout their concern, they fall over backward in the effort to show how little weight matters, quick to inform us of how unjust other forms of commercial advertising are, yet at the same time shun and humiliate people with weight. It is exactly that type of hypocrisy which I see too often in this forum, that makes me recoil and think "Gross how ugly". Maybe you could learn something here but then how would that ever benefit you. I will let you know that my scales, one with a BMI readout tells me I am obese, but i ignore that as it is plainly wrong in terms of the . ;) I will never make a call of fat or thin on anyone ever, i have never done so, that is something the ugly people do. I am not afraid of saying something unpopular, I have convictions, and I stand by them, even if that makes me unpopular. Have you considered at all the metaphor at work here, fat born of excess, ugly with the stain of hypocrisy.
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RHP User
10 years ago
It is brave of you to share in the forum the fact that you have "walked a mile" in so many people's shoes. I am truly humbled. Sadly, I do not concur with the sentiments of your post though. I believe there IS a silver cloud in every lining. Every single person who walks the earth is on their journey, learning their lessons of life. Sometimes we are part of that journey, whether we like it or not. But we can walk away and not be part, not allow them to bring us down to their level of apathy and inadequateness. Keep up your good work. Cheers. The Nurturer.
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RHP User
10 years ago
TheNurturer We can chose to not be part of some peoples lives, but it is somewhat unpractical in the human world, with us being the type of animal to actually need a social structure to be part of for our very health and survival. Solitary confinement is considered one of the most inhuman treatments that can be administered. So what of those forced to turn their backs due to the actions of a few. Those ones are left to feel outcast. It is the nature of the ugly ones to control that access and it is the tools that they use that makes them ugly. They are in the disguises, defenders of virtue and justice, yet some are maliciously destructive. I care not what trauma they may have suffered to be so, I care only to limit their power. Should I be quiet and allow that ugly part of humanity to continue. It could be an option, if only I could resist the urge to make change. But I can not and I will not be quiet when I feel I have something to say. I am somewhat surprised that you would say I have walked a mile in so many shoes. I have walked a long way in my own, but never have I claimed to know what it is like to be another. I am guessing you have also missed the point, which so many have done, but that is the nature of the trap and i was fully aware that it will bite and sting back as well. Well I will continue to hope that some can understand, hope that some can see that fat is not ugly, for every person that jumps at the defense of fat is in fact perpetuating the myth that it needs sympathy and defending, that fat is ugly. Though not all do it with ugly mind, it is very hard to determine who they are as there is such pressure here to be virtuous it almost demands ugly hypocrisy,
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'chevtrek' As I am shopping I have watched the crap people load into there trolleyslike a dozen 2 litre coke/V/Red bull.Some by for them but some buy for there children and reality is unless your real stupid you have to know it will damage your health or yourchildren's.I think this is what Blindman might mean aaaah....For the love of Grammar :) 1, there is no such thing "I have watched" - "I watched" is the correct form 2. "like a dozen" - "about a dozen" is the correct form 3. "there children" - is "their children" as relative pronoun is the correct form 4. "and reality is" should read "and the reality" - pronoun is missing 5. "your stupid" - you ARE 5 mistakes in barely 5 rows of writing..
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RHP User
10 years ago
I think it is more about turning the negative into a positive. Understand both sides of the story being that I have changed the things in which I considered ugly about myself and helped my wife lose an already 37kg. It has taken me years to make her understand that it takes more than one thing to make a person ugly. If you own your choices, wear them proud and are confident that to me beats any stereotypical sexy person hands down. So I'll say I may not be a 10/10 in the looks department but what I have I have worked hard for and will wear loud and proud. There are many a guys out there that would love to have my physique and also the same with the ladies would love to enjoy it. I'm not everyone's choice but that's their issue. You move on, Next please. Two things I dislike about myself are the size of my ears and nose. But turning that into a positive my wife always has something to grab onto and drive me in further and when my tongue gets tired I have a nose that can back me up. Could be worse, could be tongue tied with a flat nose. Look for the positive. Rant Over - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Beautiful in all aspects, simple, direct, informative, educational, and with a nasty sting. Shame about the sting, but it is not at all ugly.
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RHP User
10 years ago
You know you choose how you react right ? Offended, amused, indignant, outraged, indifferent. What you should be asking yourselves is why.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' Quoting 'Any_Whichway' Do you warm the sausage first? or you a daredevil, straight from the fridge? Who cold kransky... hmm. I am allowed to dip in sauce before I deep throat it? Watch out for the cheese kransky. When they get too excited they explode with all the hot gooey cheese sauce going down your throat ... LG
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RHP User
10 years ago
Could you please give me an example of what you have gone through that prompted you to make your post. Thank you. MrsSAF x
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Mischeviouslad
10 years ago
Interesting how its a debate, but those who do not agree..... are labelled as not reading. I think its patently clear Blindman that you DO have issues with overweight people. And I say that because out of all the self esteem manifested issues you refer to....... you have singled out being overweight You did not make reference to any other of the traits you find ugly among people..... just.... the fat whingers, and used words like ugly and revolting in connection to them.... then tried to justify the abuse by claiming closeness to big friends. Im certain, you would never use such references within their earshot for fear of fat-shaming or offending..... your friends. But fat strangers are fair game. Thats a very poor reflection on your judgement of the stranger who may be having a fat-day whinge today, yet, might be someone you learn to respect and admire.... tomorrow..... just as you claim to respect your big friends now. The only difference... is you found a reason NOT to dislike those people who became your big friends.Or, they found a reason not to dislike..... you. So I don't believe your line about not considering weight when you meet people....... you do..... IF they're whinging about it. However...... we both agree on one thing... The world is full of whingers...... .....Including people who whinge about people who whinge about being "fat". DG
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RHP User
10 years ago
with what they got. I look at myself in the mirror and I am happy what I see. I am this stunning beauty which shines. I know you can't see it from my Photos, BUT when you meet me you know. So the bottom line is, BE YOURSELF. It takes a long time to get your mind set in the right direction, still when you worked with it it just clicks in the right way. So I say, I am just awesome, kind, a Bossy boot, and giggler, a lover, a hugger a kisser, round happy and teary sometimes. All round just a normal person. The end.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting '50zcool' You know you choose how you react right ? Offended, amused, indignant, outraged, indifferent. What you should be asking yourselves is why. Finally someone gets it. The irony is that it was not even a trick question. "What makes you (forum posters) beautiful." Many did see the question and did described their own beauty, in their own words. Not always that easy to do as we generally are taught to be modest. The choice was easy, say something beautiful, and with that demonstrate to all your beauty, or you can find something ugly to say about someone else, namely me, and demonstrate what is not beauty. It is entirely irrelevant what I think is beautiful and what is not. Being fat or thin is also irrelevant. So why the did so many choose to be ugly? As 50zcool pointed out. That I will have to leave for each to ask themselves if they care to. Why are the forums here so full of ugly, so much judgment and moralizing. A recent study found that societies with the least stringent set of morality are significantly less violent, and the people rate higher in happiness scales than those from stricter moralistic cultures. You can not impose morality, to do so is a path to anger, hate, and eventually violence. But that is a subject for another day.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Give it up Mischeviouslad you have completely missed the point. It has absolute nothing to do with peoples size, and was just to see how people would react to a deliberately decisive issue. At no point did I call any fat people ugly due to weight. From the OP"One of the ugly ones is low personal self esteem directed outward. People who blame the world, people who constantly whinge, people who always make the people around them ugly." Ask your self.Why can I not just be beautiful? Why do you feel I must make others ugly? What do I seek to gain from my display of moralistic outrage? I feel that I should say sorry, but I will resist that urge because so many beautiful people responded that I feel the question was obvious and not a trap.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Satisfyafantasy' Could you please give me an example of what you have gone through that prompted you to make your post. Thank you. MrsSAF x As a direct result of my opinions here on these forums. Oh nothing more than death threats, hate mail and phone calls, and a fair amount of public character assassination. It was the only time in my life I ever considered contacting the police. Why, because I was openly bisexual, my views on safe sex, and being proud and vocal. That happened some years back, and represents only an isolated few individuals who have long since disappeared, and nothing like that has happened before or after. But I make it my mission to stir the cesspool from time to time as it unfortunately made me a little ugly.
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AnnieWhichway
10 years ago
Another blinder........ Annie xxx
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RHP User
10 years ago
Very wise words. Love the way you put it. As someone who once wore a "shit coat" it was only through the love and support of the people around me, who listened to me moan; who let me get the poison out and then encouraged me to find my own strength and truth when i was ready to change and occasionally were brutally honest with me when i needed a reality check and a kick up the bum; that I have been able to turn my life around and it's getting better each day! It's about choice, when you are ready. Thank you for sharing x
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RHP User
10 years ago
As someone who was obese, sad, a victim, full of anger and hatred and self-loathing, with glasses and acne I had to make a choice. I had to see what i didn't like about myself and decide if i wanted to live with those imperfections. I chose to change. I'm not skinny, i'm curvaceous and i love my body! I love my eyes and lips. I love how sometimes i just dance, for no reason, anywhere! Even in the shop! I love having a laugh and often embarrass my daughter lol! I love being a romantic and looking at the moon just because it's so beautiful. I love how i cry if something moves me, a movie, a song, the way my ex looks at my daughter. I LOVE who i am because only i know what I've had to overcome to become the strong, sexy, independent woman i am today!! To those still struggling, it gets better. Believe me!! But only if you chose to help yourself. If you need to vent, counselors are very helpful, I love mine! she's ace and i don't feel guilty burdening friends and family with what i'm working on. Time heals all things Peace, Love and Mungbeans!!!
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blackbig
10 years ago
Quoting BM "Why are the forums here so full of ugly, judgement and moralising" I ponder...I ponder ... where are those happy openminded people . I could not believe the responses to one of the forum about age recently..😳😳 It real give the forums such a bad taste ... Some personal opinions should just remain personal . Peace , happiness and love. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting Blindman: "I make it my mission to stir the cesspool from time to time as it unfortunately made me a little ugly." Honesty, a beautiful thing. ;-)
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RHP User
10 years ago
An ugly experience (by definition) more often than not, can be either a lesson (reflection wise) and/or a first line of defence in any given situation. The more challenging or confronting the experience, the more beautiful the outcome in terms of lessons learnt or simply appreciating the beauty beneath - or the good that comes out of it (it being the experience) going forward.
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chevtrek
10 years ago
But like politics no one has the answers.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Quoting 'Blindman67' The choice was easy, say something beautiful, and with that demonstrate to all your beauty, or you can find something ugly to say about someone else, namely me, and demonstrate what is not beauty. I hope you've had fun with your little psychological experiment. You were perfectly aware of what you were doing when you wrote that OP in a deliberately inflammatory manner. And let me get this straight....for people to live up to your lofty morality ideals and prove that they are not narrow-minded and judgemental, they were supposed to ignore your own narrow-minded and judgemental OP and comments, and instead give you sweetness and light. Yeah...to me that's just a dressed up form of trolling mixed in with a spectacular level of hypocrisy and lack of self-awareness. Based on previous form though, none of this really surprises me.
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RHP User
10 years ago
It just saddens and puzzles me...why put up such a hateful hate filled post?..if you have such contempt for the people posting here why bother with us? This is not debate.just trolling ,finger pointing and name calling..ugly indeed.I vowed I wasn't going to post again on this thread because I hate feeding trolls,oh well.
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RHP User
10 years ago
Behind his computer, thoroughly entertained at how easily he made everyone jump. (I'm having visions of Mr Burns going "Dance, my pretties! Eeexcellent.) I'm just wondering if you realise that quite a few here are aware you're trolling, BM, and think you're the joke. Is your username a reference to that blind spot you appear to have? I loved your forum on how to make profile pics non-traceable, and am hoping to see you post another useful topic soon.
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RHP User
10 years ago
I thought this was about being positive, embracing inner beauty and radiating it. Now it's a witch hunt. Some of you who I thought knew better surprise me. Radiate people, radiate. 😍
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RHP User
10 years ago
SweetSinnger The most beautiful people are the ones at peace with them selves and the world, they understand that they can never be accepted by everyone, but it does not matter for they are unto them selves precious, perfect, beauty. To give one's self that mind set is freedom. Thank you for sharing, thank you for being beautiful. Don't stop dancing. :) BlackBigI got a friend to have a read through the forums recently, just to make sure my bias was not effecting my assessment. She agreed, it has the taste of bitter morality, and the stench of a judgmental lynch mob. How strange that is in what is a adult dating and sex site, a place one would expect understanding, not to be judged, a place that is fun and fantasy can be expressed without fear of being shamed and humiliated. It is unfortunately the outcome of the underlying competitive nature of the forums, morality wins favor. Words do not require action, and hypocrisy is the norm. Yet there are enough beautiful people here to make it worth while to stay and feel their delightful glow. xKiwiBredxThe intellectual rationalist of the forums, always insightful. LOL ugly the new beautiful.. just a thought. AnnieYou beautiful girl you, thanks.
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