M62 F64
being stood up by single guys
January 29 2009
Comments
-
RHP User
16 years ago
happens to us all the time however we have managed to establish a group of very reliable guys so if one isnt available we allways have back up lol
-
RHP User
16 years ago
They also have often stood me up too, so i steer clear now. I think one reason could be that cos they are single they have more opportunites to meet people for sex whereas, married guys have less options.
-
playfulminx
16 years ago
They think a MFM is hot but many do find it nerve-wracking and bail. For this reason I specify that I am only seeking MFM or group experienced guys (not FMF). I will chat to them at length about their experiences and take things from there. It's fairly easy to tell which guys are completely cool with MFM or not. The guys who aren't invariably ask: * If I would consider seeing them on my own first... * Can hubby just watch us in the beginning or he watch us before joining... * Is he bi or str8.. Not always the case but most MFM experienced guys know what goes on, so as long as they see that hubby is listed as 'straight' they know what to expect, rather than keep asking. I am not sure about the original posters case but I wonder if there are some guys who agree to a bi MFM and decide at the last minute that they're not curious enough lol
-
playfulminx
16 years ago
Another thought but if the lady is indeed very attractive, I think some guys find it a bit daunting too. The pressure to perform and the idea of disappointing the lady can get to a lot of guys. They'd rather hang on to the fantasy of nearly having the pleasure than to risk ruining it completely.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
wish i was close to you both i wouldnt let you down married guys would be more available and discreet as being married for a long time makes me wanna try new adventures so cum on cpls give me a go like to try it all
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I been involved in a few straight MFM a few gang bangs and orgies , having a group is all part of the turn on , did get a bit nervous the first time it was in the play room at club oz with a shit load of people watching, went back for more. You may just need to find experienced guys.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I've stated on the forums and on my profile that I'm not bi or bi curious but being involved in a MFM does have an interest for me. Once again I'm too far away from you mores the pity,but if someone makes a commitment you recon they'd follow through on it or let you know they can't make it a good few hours before or be honest and let you know that this isn't what they are into. Not so sure about them getting better offers maybe just not as sure as they first thought.
-
windtalker38
16 years ago
Standing you up? these guys must be made Id never stand anyone up unless it was life or death. Its not what red hot is about its geting out and meeting people for some adult fun and chat
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Its not jsut men that dont show up. I had been dealign with a couple on this site for a while and had arranged them to come to my g/fs 21st party. It was at a night club so it wasnt like they woudlnt know anyone it was supposed to be a random meet without my gf knowing. I wated all night for them called them and nothing. They said they where fine with comeing and meeting at the party as it woudl look like some random ppl just walking up to us. And i understand why some guys might not turn up as most ppl have said it is a bit of a big thing doing ur 1st mmf. I was lucky enough to have had a few drinks and it was with my best mate so didnt erealy matter i guess. We are about to start cppls soon and i know i am already a bit nerves.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
dare i say you feel even more of a twat when you are stood up as a single girl?
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Been ther and done that you are right it is a huge dissapointment when it happens. Even worse when 2 guys dont turn up as arranged.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I wouldn't stand someone up but as yet have not even had the chance to anyway. Seems no one wants to meet me, can't understand why, their loss.
-
VeryClassy
16 years ago
It is frustrating... We have had somne success online but do much better meeting 'qualified' players at a club first!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
if any of u cpls want a single guy an who will turn up here i am msg me an i will be there
-
RHP User
16 years ago
if any of u cpls want a single guy an who will turn up here i am msg me an i will be there
-
RHP User
16 years ago
We have been stood up heaps of times by single guys. I really think its quite amusing when they say sorry I forgot I had another arrangement that night etc which is fare enough. Then you find them still checking out your profile every 5 minutes on line that night.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
They might have limited amounts of single guys, but believe me, you'll have some decent options. It's hard to find couples that are after single guys, even at clubs. Or just find some couples instead.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
You've been inviting the wrong guys. I challenge anyone here to name a night i've stood them up. On the other hand i've been cut out of a lot of the swinging scene because i refuse to make further contact with couples, more rarely women and *sigh* even one husband after meeting them as a couple, who have stood me up. So if we want to get on our high horse... lol Who is it you real players contact? It certainly isn't me and pretty easy guess its not any of the real guys like me. What is your selection criteria? Sounds to me like you shouldn't be picking on the guys, you should be examining your selection criteria a little more closely ;)
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I reckon it is worse being stood up as a single woman, yes but it is inexcusable and yeah, what the hell is with these guys. I don't get it, has happened to me a couple of times already. I think they should be exposed!!! Something like the validations on profiles. We should have a rhp SHAME file, where we can name them. It would help us filter out and maybe even get rid of the people here that are setting others up.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Thats all very well a good idea.. but due to DEFAMATION shit.. it wouldnt go well.. This is partly why we created the RHPu group.. to aid them in their decision without endangering themselves of meeting them. Sparty
-
RHP User
16 years ago
beeing stood up is one thing what about the singles and couples that just what to waste your time by sending flirts and messages saying were a bit busy at the moment but want to meet but never do and like others arrange a time to meet on neutral grounds but never turn up.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Sparty I thank you for your comment. I'm not thinking along the lines of defaming people, I do try not to judge and never to put people down, more like exposing them. I still think it is a shame that rhp don't have an application to weed out the fakes. For instance: Photo fake or very old; Age not true; A Setup... Geez The list could go on and on and it is only us that can tell the stories, of time wasters. We don't need to tell stories, just basic truths. Forcing people to tell the truth, be real or be exposed, they needn't be defamed. They are already worthless to this otherwise interesting and diverse site. Thanks rhp.... Try and find better weeding tools for this fascinating garden that your people are tending. Keep on growing Love and joy XXX
-
RHP User
16 years ago
It is quite a small matter with the flirts and messages, even msn contact that doesn't go further. But to make and confirm an arrangement, ones that I've driven hours to keep and then just shutdown contact right at the time is a huge let down. I cannot understand what kind of kicks people are getting out of it. Except that they are not real and cannot stand up in the real world, doing that sort of thing keeps their egos boosted??? I don't know? We all need a lotta luck on here... Is like the lotto.
-
StookyAndChooky
16 years ago
we are couple we are looking for females still get stood up, thought more than likely that males would show up more so than females cause they first in the rooms to say how horny they are etc asking chicks to show boobies etc. we can relate to you both in all messages etc we are attractive couple and get told we are cute together etc hate it when we see the chicks are going for the players n pricks online then they complain about it we like shit we would treat with respect etc still no takers what is rhp about anyway if you cant even meet people the way u desire
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I understand and agree with you. This is where Validation comes in handy.. but sometimes that is not enough to aid the decision. The Secret Section of the Forums helps a bit.. but the problem with that is that ple ask about a certian person.. and tells a story about it.. without waiting for others to submit their input. As for Guys secret.. dont go there.. its all abotu cock cravings and shit. only Once a guy asked about if a chick of certian nick is real or not.. the rest is all.. bleh.. not even WORTH looking into. I never seen the womens... but from what im hearing.. they sorta done what yer saying. BUT.. not all read the forums. so yeah.. perhaps something else.. a scoring point for each profile a THUMBS UP or THUMBS DOWN score.. *shrugs* ..
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Not a good idea. Going by some of the nasty emails received after a 'thanks but no thanks' reply from us, I believe that the said same people would use such a facility in a dishonest manner to lash out. I think we just have to take the good with the bad and take solace in the knowledge that there are the 'for real' people out there, we just have to find them.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
it has happened to us, more times than we care to mention, not only by men, but by women and other cpls, think most on these sites use it as a fantasy only, when it gets real, they cant take that step, life is too short, but not everybody shares that view
-
smegen
16 years ago
HE IS JUST AN IDIOT. THEW WORLD IS FULL OF THEM
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I've met couples before and it is very nerve racking the first time I must admit but it's also one of my biggest fantasys to be with a guy while his g/f or wife watches. I'm definately more comfortable if we meet for drinks first or at least go there without expectations just to "get to know each other more". Any couples interested in having a bi guy join the party send me a msg I love it
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I don't think anyone who is serious on here would stand another up intentionally. Problem is those non single males that are serious, either have such high standards the people they try for are arrogant jerks who have nothing going for them except their looks, or they have restrictions that are limit most of the people out. If you are being stood up by single guys its simple..you are looking at the wrong ones. There is a huge ratio of guys to all others on this site, more than a lot of others. If any couple or single girl living near a major centre cannot find a single guy to join them within a week they may as well give up. If thats the case they must be pretty seriously flawed in some way.
-
StookyAndChooky
16 years ago
The validation thing is a good idea but either people don't use for some reason, maybe lazyiness, or they haven't had any success to get a validation in the first place, like us lmao :P I can't believe people go through the whole message thing and say they are keen but bail out at the last minute. It's rude and unfair I reckon. Ah well such is life on RHP it seems :-/ Stooky.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I've been stood up as many times, relative to oportunity lol, as anybody but one thing i would like to make plain. I never feel i've been stood up if i've been contacted and reason it called off given. The earlier it is the more believable it is. We all have unexpected things crop up that force us to change our plans no matter how much we'd rather be somewhere else. That should never be a problem, it happens. Lets make clear that being stood up is the virtually inexcusable no show without contact, or the last moment laimo... ;) One good thing about big parties, the party is still fun even with the unavoidable "can't make it's"... Not that i know that from orgies, have learnt it from gang bangs and one or two dogging sessions though :)
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Woody... You've done it again, well said. It is the inexcusable I refer too and I wonder if these people shouldn't be exposed, without malice??? My $1 000 000.00 question.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
We have meet the most wonderful single guys from RHP and continue to do so every week. Not to mention heaps of single ladies and hundreds of couples. Keep searching people, sometimes people feel safer attending a club more than your own home etc. So maybe go to a club and arrange to meet them there is our advice to you all.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
In my rants I have failed to mention that I have met loads of genuine guys, they are here, for me just not the 'one' yet. I do realise these fakes are a minority and that I have been on a bit of a tangent... Oops, you get that. It happens. XXX
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Clubs don't work for me. Thats no reflections on either clubs or myself. Its simply that due the difference in available numbers and the behaviour of certain single guys any guy who shows up at a club alone is behind the eight ball to start with. Unless he can very quickly fit in socially he is going to stay behind the eight ball because the more he is seen standing on his own the more he is going to be labled. Some guys, myself included, just aren't that socially adept. In here is different, i can say what i want to say without waiting my turn to talk... Its the same when i'm chatting with someone one on one, i'm fine ;).
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Gotta stand up so i can kick myself in the ass... again. Bringing that back to the thread... ummm. It may help explain why guys often aren't keen on the larger parties but even then they shouldn't commit in the first place. It doesn't excuse them from meeting a lovely couple. I can't apply what i said to your thread mikeandshel, sorry about the off thread post... Ok, so does anybody have any idea why single guys would stand that lovely couple up? Not me... lol. I wish i could offer but i'm too far away, a smoker and hairy *sigh*
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I hate it when that happens and when it does, they are wiped. I will still chat with them but I will make it clear that they will never get any action from me! And Woody...Couples International is a bit different to other clubs when it comes to meeting as alot of the patrons are on RHP and come into the chat rooms....so it's really like meeting people you already know! So perhaps there is a similar type club near you?? I also find it's the guys I wasn't planning to meet that are the ones I end up being friends with...perhaps I too need to change my selection criteria???
-
RHP User
16 years ago
well we aren't about to change our selection criteria, its what we want. if we say we will meet, we do. simple. its about manners and decency. we don't n wont make promises or undertakings we cant follow through with. if a guy says they will meet, then it needs to happen. sounds to us as though these guys are sitting at home wanking over the idea of meeting, but when fantasy becomes reality its all too much.. we wonder if this is why they're single to start with?
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I know this is going to be controversial, especially considering my previous post but having considered... Have you thought that just maybe most single guys aren't that desperate? The most vocal ones, the ones that constantly attack your inbox maybe are but just possibly they are not the majority ;) So maybe look a little further than your inbox... lol.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
i think its about time us couples named and shamed these single guys that waste our time mr gets a weekend off evry 3 months and to have it wasted is just unforgivable we ahd that happen tonite and at 11pm the guy messaged us saying sorry when i said there is no second chances he got angry and accused us off cancelling on him in the past saying that he had made plans with us and that we had stood him up. i find the whole thing amusing as we dont have any shortage of willing single guys we have never stood any one up and if we were on the off chance unable to make it we would call and explain the situation but that has never happened as yet we say what we will do now in saying that i need to state there there has only been one occassion where a single guy has been let down by us and unfortunately that was woody and hopefully one day we can make it up to him as he is a great guy and deserved better we hope you can forgive us woody we will make it upto you if you will let us. as for the guy that stood us up tonite well as much as i would love to name him its just just in us to do so he has been deleted and blocked and will never get the opportunity to do it to us again. soto all you single guys yes there is couples that like to play with you just dont fuck us around wee not desperate and there is a lot of you so were kind off spoiled for choice. just be genuine and honest and dont say you can if you cant or are just in it for the fantasy. most of us have young families and jobs so our time is limited be nice and kind to each other Sarah & Andy
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I do see how people will leave you high and dry, I have had experience with swapping partners which did involve a MFM 3some, I believe its best to try things more than once incase your first time went crap, which mine sorta was. Now thinking about it, I would like to try it again hmmmmm
-
RHP User
16 years ago
For gods sake i'm hopeless with nicks lol. I've only just clicked to who you are. I didn't feel i received sufficient apology at the time but how can i not forgive having received a public apology ;). I have looked at photos of your parties with a little envy, and regret over our difference, but like you i don't take kindly to getting mucked around. Things like that can happen but all it takes is a genuine apology and you've certainly done that posting it in here. Thank you. I have a new lady friend who is so much like me in so many respects its a little scary lol. I'm sure if we were invited to one of your parties on a weekend i would only have to mention it to her, would be no need to talk her into coming with me ;).
-
RHP User
16 years ago
sorry to say I am glad Im not the only one being stood up, I don't understand those who go the distance with mail, then chat, txt and line up a meet then nothing. I would prefer to know the other party was no longer interested rather than nothing, leaves you wondering. Q
-
RHP User
16 years ago
most single guys arent that desperate? why? because their hands such good company , and cheap too?? are you for real?these guys are single because they havent got anyone or cant keep them! maybe thats it? my gal is sexy and beautiful, loves sex, and has few inhibitions. the guys that stand us up are obviously wankers. nothing else. as for naming and shaming them? absolutely!!! put a testimonial on their profile! watermark it with "loser". put a list of "timewasters" together that will highlight the hassles they bring with them! we'd like to see their profiles canceled and their ip addresses banned form the site. . . . . . . . . . . .
-
RHP User
16 years ago
we had it happen payed for a room (notcheap)as we wanted it to br just rite rang the two of them were keen two hrs before and than couldent b contacted ithink a good idea is to be able to mark there name down as noshowers unless they ring txt or try to tell you they carnt make it.its not fair that it cost you money time and pride if you dont want to meet than just tell the truth its better all round
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I think as mentioned the issue is with single guys who have not had a MFM before, who by all means hold it as high as a fantasy, but are yet taken that step, and to do so contains an abundence of nerves, fears and trepidation. Whilst there penis and hormones are screaming yes, there brain is screaming warning. I personally have stood up one couple (not on RHP) but gave them ample notice that morning before the meet that night. I chose to bail on the fact I did not know the couple very well, had only had one brief meeting with them and the night was a full bondage session, in the end I decided I was not comfortable enough to trust the couple I did not know and relinquish control to them. HUGE regret now, but valid concern at the time. Prehaps mikeandshel you simply have very poor taste in the quality or reliability of the people you choose? After you last post about why the single are apparently single, the hand being a cheap date, not being able to attract or maintain a partner, im not surprised more people stand you up, you sound like a flat out twat. Woody, for someone who has no social skills (profile) you post a hell of a lot!!! You always make me laugh, especially when sparty is involved and you seem like a very open and genuine person, prehaps mikeandshel could take a leaf from your book.
-
HotOzCouple_cc
16 years ago
Instead of naming and shaming, why not name the great guys that do stand up, follow through and become reliable? Naming and Shaming only creates animosity and anger from both sides, and for the guy, you completely ridicule and blow any other chance he may have in the future with anyone on RHP. Naming and shaming will also cause profiles to be ignored and new ones set up, and there's no point in that. It would be much better to build up a 'database' of great guys, girls, and couples... Another thing that would be great from RHP would be a locked couples forum. A place where we can chat about without having to worry about input or viewing from singles. Guys get it, Girls get it, why can't the couples? Arguably, they're the least of the 'fakes' on RHP!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Take it easy. Just because you can't meet the right guys doesn't mean you should be hanging your rap on all of us. Blame your attitude and your taste in guys... There's plenty of decent blokes here. I doubt after that free for all that any would come any where near you. Of course there are many blokes still interested in meeting you... Good luck.
-
StookyAndChooky
16 years ago
its sad but true, because the single chicks are getting screwed around by the single guys then in turn they are not even bothering with the couples at all. Its no fun for anyone being stood up period really. I wounder if the guys have been stood up the chicks as well mayb thats why they are doin it back to them goes both ways really.
-
luvs6869
16 years ago
we got stood up by two guys in one weekend.... they were hot to trot prior to meeting...same story, pull out at the last minute... is it a game of chicken to them?
-
RHP User
16 years ago
hmmm... my guess is that the ones protesting the most are single guys.... maybe out of guilt? have you in truth stood couples up? i think yes.... glad i sound like a twat. do you get also that we are pissed off and frustrated? that we believe that single guys who stand others up should be ridiculed? you betcha we do! as for anger?? thats the whole reason for our post!!! anger! frustration! annoyance! call it what you will, we just wanted to have a genuinely fun time with a "reliable" guy...........another fantasy obviously coz it aint gonna happen is it??
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I have been stood up by girls and a couple. I imagine they are just teasing, but it doesn't make it easy to have faith in people. I am on here to meet people, but from my experiences, most just want to chat and string me along.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I would never stand someone up female or couple, but I have been stood up by couples and man is it annoying.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
its not just couples that it hapens to i have hadit happen to me where th couple bails at the last minite
-
RHP User
16 years ago
In your case shel i am not quite sure why they would bail out. But it happens regardless of whether they are single men, couples or even a women. You could speculate as to why but who really knows why but them? Maybe a less daunting meet up venue could be arranged, say dinner and in that way there is no pressure and a connection beyond just the physical could be shared. As an adjunct, my partner and I have looked at your profile and query whether your stated age was a mistake- you have an amazing youthful body.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
The main reason a single guy would stand you up would be a lack of self confidence. Dont worry girls & couples, single guys can be vain & nervous too! :-) Been there, done that & I can tell you they probably needed a drink or too. LoL.
-
Badbabe469
16 years ago
I think you guys were lucky - he bothered to txt you !! We havent even been that lucky at times. Rearange work so we can meet up and they dont even bother to let you know!! what goes!! It's hard enough living in a small town never mind a big city I reckon just unreliable!!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
our stated ages are absolutely correct, matter of fact shel turns 48 in may. all the women here could have similar bodies if they wished. its a matter of commitment and effort. but thats not the subject at hand, it does seem that most of the couples here have experienced the same as us, and its the single guys who are screaming the loudest, we think they protest their innocence far too much. why cant we just name and shame and move on?
-
RHP User
16 years ago
had anyone not turn up... :-Deb
-
RHP User
16 years ago
We've found that the main reason we've been stood up is because the 'single men' are in fact act married or have partners and are living out a fantacy until it's time to become reality by meeting us.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
We were stood up this weekend by a seemingly really nice, well qualified guy. Has his reasons it seems. Recently seperated and scene was to be in his marital home. Should have backed out a week ago though, not 3 hours beforehand.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
nice topic mikeand shell, far from not turning up when invited I find that most people/couples you message fail to reply. They decide your fate without any courtesy and in the end you stop messaging as it appears to be a waste of time. I think it boils down to how genuine people are and clicking on the right button at the right time.At the risk of using this as an add for myself I'd say if you or another couple are interested....... click on me. I might even turn out to be an ok guy and even might turn up to a meeting ...... especially if you ask me nicely,,,, lol
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Peachy... who would be foolish enough to stand up a lovely doll like you??
-
RHP User
16 years ago
From what i understand alot of guys are all talk but are chicken shit when it comes to showing up with "the goods" My problem is finding couples i find!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Hey Mike & Shel I have complimented you on your pics b4. I'm rather confident that if we could arrange a suitable time, I would show......you are certainly worth the effort!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
To "stand up" a couple is extremely rude, something I never do. I am genuine and always meet as arranged.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
freddoagain, we have no doubt that some guys, perhaps yourself, wouldn't let us down, but if you're not what we want, we wont invite you. sorry..........
-
RHP User
16 years ago
some guys are just weak i am the male in this couple and before i met my gorgeous girl i had met up with about 20 couples for fun the first few times i was nervous but never backed down all you guys out there gotta grow a back bone and come play whne you say you will
-
RHP User
16 years ago
i personally would never stand a couple up. Have been trying for so long too find one it sucks for me everyone ruining single guys rep.
-
Stooky
16 years ago
I have read through this thread and can't believe this happens so much! I am an attached male that is allowed to play alone. This is my 'solo' profile but also have a couples profile 'StookyAndChooky'. If any couple is looking for a male playmate with possible friendship that is reliable then don't hesitate in sending a message to either profile. Of course you are more than welcome to speak to my other half to know it's all above board, and would actually prefer this. Ciao ...
-
RHP User
16 years ago
The latest comments seem to back up my previous opinion that there are plenty of guys out there that wouldn't stand up a couple but do not even get the chance because they are overlooked in the first place. Sometimes when you go for the models they turn out to be more into themselves than worried about anyone elses feelings.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
I've been in the situation where a guy has contacted me, wants to meet, but I can't. So I say: "what about in a couple of hours?". Invariably they respond: "Yeah, no worries". And, of course, in a couple of hours they are no where ot be found. I think that they get off on the whole interchange of messages, the expectation of sex, etc, etc. Then they have a wank. And then the desire goes... I think for couples looking for MFM or MMF the same thing is probably going on. However, I have also found that there are a lot of guys who are very uncomfortable having sex with another guy present. I think that they are turned on by the thought of group sex, but haven't actually processed what that would actually involve. I was fucking with a friend in the little porn room at the Burswood club a few weeks ago and a guy came in and started watching us. My friend asked him if he wanted a blow-job and so, while I fucked her, she sucked him. AFter a while, I took a break and she got him to sit on the couch while she sucked him. I was sitting next to him while this was going on. I got up and went off to get a drink and came back a minute or so later. Afterwards she told me that while he was fairly erect, he got really hard after I left the room, and started to go down again when I got back. I think that this is probably due to a bit of inexperience perhaps. Maybe they are unsure of what they are supposed to do with the other guy. Maybe they are just a tad homophobic and don't want to look "gay". Who knows. But I think that a lot of guys just don't think it through. It's group sex!!! You will end up in close proximity to the other guy. It's inevitable. It doesn't mean he's going to ream your arse out. To the couples looking for single guys, I would recommend that you contact other couples like you and see if they can recommend someone that they have had success with.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
After reading through this post i must say i have to say. " It is simply not that important " especially for us as a couple. the lifestyle is all about Us as a couple, and if someone doesnt turn up . so what. We dont simply care. After all, it is their loss and not a concern to us other than the waste of our time waiting for 10 mins and if they dont turn up stiff shit. To play with others is simply not that important. after all, all that matters is us and we can simply play with eachother and have just as much fun. Those that make playing with others soooo important that they get pissed off or upset at someone not turning up etc. really should look at themselves, yes it is a piss off and yes it is a time waster, But really.. what does it matter, it "simply is not that important" is it. Leesa
-
HotOzCouple_cc
16 years ago
Great post Leesa!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
yes its a "piss off" which was the whole point of the posting. its rude and unreasonable. we are new at this and find it to be exciting and arousing, for both of us. if we get worked up and are subsequently disappointed by some one who bails on us at the last minute (and i mean within minutes of when he was to arrive) we have every right to be annoyed, and will voice that annoyance. we dont do clubs. we dont think we are so wrapped up in ourselves that everyone we invite should actually arrive as planned, but when someone texts, saying hes on his way and then bails with little or no explanation, we do become a bit put off by the whole thing. yes we play alone, just the two of us and its the most incredible, intense times, but adding someone else is exciting too, and we'd like to explore this with some honest, reliable and considerate people. we just seem to have ended up with a couple of the sad ones and were asking for feedback from the others here who had experienced the same or similar........
-
RHP User
16 years ago
just an observation.........this is the most popular posting in the couples forum, which just goes to show that we are not alone in our experiences with single guys. seems like a huge number of people have similar stories to ours. kinda makes you wonder we think............
-
RHP User
16 years ago
It may not matter to us as a couple if someone bails,we have us to play with and yeah it is about us, BUT it is a "piss off" as mike and shell say because like a lot of others , us included, they most likely have to organise sitters for the kids , sometimes even a place to play only to find its all been in vain and what little spare time we all seem to have these days is wasted. And yes in our own experiences guys are the worst for it unfotunately...we think too many get caught up in the fantasy of it all and when reality comes around cant handle it . Probably spending too much time wanking over porn sites , but who knows . We can also attest to the fact that many so called single guys on these sites are actully married anyway , probably the biggest reason they dont show..cant escape the missus and kiddies haha. So to answer mike and shell...yes these guys are just playing with themselves too much obviously. Take the time to filter out the crap upfront with well some structered questions to get some straight answers from is all you can do to try and not be stuffed around is all we can say ...
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Great post Sealuvers, and while Leesa does make some valid points, i think that what mikeandshel are getting at is not the fct that they didnt get to play with someone else, but just the sheer time wasting factor, and perhaps in some cases arranging baby sitters, etc etc.That is when it does matter. Like when we got stood up by a couple, just the mere fact that we had rearranged our evening, re organised our kids etc for a couple who never showed anyway. Just annoying and timewasting when we could have been doing something else.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
If singles guys or gals, get stood up as well? Not just couples? and I wondered, the reasons are the same as stooding up couples? Lots to think about.. i guess.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
thanks lovingcouple...... you hit the nail on the head. yes its all the other arranging thats upsetting. we have lives. kids. jobs etc and making time isnt just a simple "yes lets play " decision. it takes effort and energy and sometimes thats very hard to do. we have 2 weekends in 8 that we can play. and we if go through the effort of getting organized, we'd like there to be a positive outcome!!!!!!!!!!!!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Mikeandshell. I totally agree, total piss off and a waste of precious time. But all i was saying was that if and when they dont turn up, use that time to be a couple and enjoy eachother, you have the room, you have the excitment, and you have the spare time. Be with eachother , and dont let some guy that could not give you the time of day to show up spoil an evening alone together. That is all. There are guys out there that do like to play and that do show up, you will find them soon and have a wonderful time i am sure. But in the meantime if they dont show, stiff shit, thier loss hey. Leesa
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Remember that some people are newbies and are shy, although that doesn't excuse rudeness. If you want someone who will guarantee to turn up and fuck you 10 minutes after entering the door on first meet maybe you should ask them for references before rather than punish them later. I agree with Leesa, these things will happen, although inconvenient, does it really matter? Maybe a bit more effort checking out people first. (Perhaps the ebay system where the buyer and seller rate each other -ha ha)
-
RHP User
16 years ago
thank you both seduction and couplesint. it does piss us off yes, but it never means we cant just play on our own. the ratings system would work if everyone gave consistent feedback, otherwise theres no point. we just dont like the timewasting that happens when trying to meet people for 'fun". if these guys dont intend to meet, why not say so? should we, as couples, start to use the "testimonial" section on peoples profiles a bit more frequently? so many questions..........
-
RHP User
16 years ago
We love the idea of validation, it would be great to see more people using it on a regular basis. People do need to be verified to validate though and it is up to the person being validated to accept lol. And validations are usually personal opinion of course, so like that movie review someone might have just read, others may well disagree. We have read profiles with several positive validations that we wouldn't consider because we feel differently. Still, I suppose it would at least prove they turn up lol. Cheers all :-*
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Here I am bustinhg my arese (so to speak) to hook up with couples - keep sendig messages - try to be creative and what do I have to show for it - squat is what!!!!!!! How hypocritical when couples add seeking 'Man' and then write in their profile no single guys - what is going on there????? Now I can sympathise with couples being stood up, but remember it works both ways. I have had a few situations where the couples have turned into two paddle pops they became that cold. I guess I wll keep plugging away and who knows what might happen.
-
Livethedream
16 years ago
How could a single guy not want to show for you two....must have rocks in their heads.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Hotnhumid05 it is something that couples don't like to mention on here. They complain about the models that don't turn up then say nothing about the 100's of single guys messages wanting to meet them that they just ignore. Double standards. If they really want someone to turn up they wouldn't be so picky in the first place. There are plenty on here that are worthwhile but don't get a look in. Having said that it is of course their perogative to pick and choose who they want to meet. It would be nice if they returned messages a bit more to others though. And the point about having men on their looking for profile and not wanting single guys at all is also pretty stupid. It isn't that hard to change which would cut down the messages they get from single guys. Would make it easier when doing a search.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Lovenlust, one of the reasons for not always returning messages is that often when we have, we then get another demanding to know why we dont want to play or something abusive. And it is hard to tell oftentimes who is going to be abusive and who isn;t. Just as easy not to reply.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
How about those couples that dont even acknowledge messages. Just a polite no thanks would suffice. Seems some want it both ways - dont like rudeness but happy to be rude!!
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Oh... no wait... it's one of those 'I don't see our planets colliding...' *disappointment* but nice that they acknowledged my presence.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
lovingcouple4u about the not replying in case you get abusive email, don't you think that is abit of an unfair comment? fair enough you may get a lot of abusive responses, but that doesn't mean that everyone is going to do it. my thoughts about the people responding wanting to know why you don't want to play, is that it might be that they are not trying to pressure, but trying to find out what they don't have that might need improving. also, if you maybe explained to them why you don't want to play in the rejection message, then they'd be glad that you actually responded and let them know... just some thoughts
-
RHP User
16 years ago
is it rude to not respond to those who obviously don't even take the time to read a profile properly????we state quite clearly that we are seeking single/unattached guys. read the profile guys, understand the words and don't dare whinge if we fail to respond to your uninvited winks and messages when we have already stated that we aren't interested.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Its surely not for us to reply to people that message us yet don't meet our criteria (ie what we are searching for) Its fairly clear in our profile what we want as well , read it its kinda crystal clear! ask and you shall receive. Perhaps we need to go to some sort of sex site where we can be really specific about exactly what we want !!!!! ............ oh thats right we are on one??????? lol
-
RHP User
16 years ago
juggalo405, the abuse by some of the guys and on occasion, couples, is such that it puts you off. we have said before a simple "no, you are too young" and have then been subjected to six messages demanding to know why 22 is too young! and have complained to the site administrators about the foul language and insulting remarks from people who just dont match and cant understand why we tell them politely that we think this. this abuse extends to emails and phone calls from people we wont ever meet, so no, sometimes polite rejection just stirs some unreasonable people into behaving terribly.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
You mean there are guys on this site who can actually afford to stand somebody up? lol
-
RHP User
16 years ago
just to keep the post alicve.... thought people would have so much more to share.....................
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Have just read through the whole post. Very interesting and some good points made by all sides. I don't go in for chat rooms or forums much due to the amount of agression you find in alot of them. People seem quite happy to behave unreasonably just because they are online. My two cents - I try to be polite to everyone, my type or not (of course I don't have the bulk mail problem that couples seem to get). It is definitely not on to arrange to meet and not show up without reasonable notice (as early as possible) regardless of gender/relationship. It is perfectly reasonable to not reply to email from people who are clearly excluded from consideration by information given in a profile (provided the profile has sufficient detail). I think that people who fit the criteria but are not selected (for whatever reason) deserve a 'thanks but no thanks' reply. If they are unable to accept this it is their problem not yours - you can always block people if they become abusive. I think a ratings system is a very good idea but it would have to be positive ratings (negatives cause too many problems judging by ebay's experience) - ie a good on you for those who are genuine and follow through on their commitments. Where that leaves those of us who haven't yet been able to make any commitments I don't know.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
Crikey, there are a lot of pretenders/wannabes out there. I've never stood anyone up (can't afford to..lol) it's not polite i've always chated heaps on msn and in chat room first and exchanged photos as well as webcam. When it's time to meet 3 of us have a bit of respect for each other and always show up and have fun. But to answer your question they probably get nervous/cold feet and bail out, don't take it personally its their loss. I was awfully nervous the first time i stumped up for a meet.
-
RHP User
16 years ago
lovingcouple4u I agree with the response from jugaloo405. In fact it is very much the problem I have. As he stated; "my thoughts about the people responding wanting to know why you don't want to play, is that it might be that they are not trying to pressure, but trying to find out what they don't have that might need improving. also, if you maybe explained to them why you don't want to play in the rejection message" That would solve a lot of problems as I have said previously in other posts. When someone is obviously not what you have stated you are after fair enough. But when someone meets all the criteria that you have in your looking for profile an explanation should be given. I have had several sorry you aren't my type responses that left me scratching my head asking why. Simple explanation would help me in those instances and maybe help me improve my profile.
Boards
-
Hot Topics
Topics: 14361 Comments: 120840
-
Girls Ask
Topics: 1355 Comments: 14709
-
Guys Ask
Topics: 2425 Comments: 17234
-
Couples' Corner
Topics: 2405 Comments: 12737
-
Swingers Lifestyle
Topics: 794 Comments: 5154
-
Fetish & Fantasy
Topics: 1148 Comments: 6957
-
Hot Travel
Topics: 622 Comments: 2145
-
LGBT
Topics: 156 Comments: 1150
Forum help
-
Something related with that
-
Going somewhere & want to hook up?
-
Hasn't that topic been posted before?
RHP's popular dating tool
-
Where the heck did that topic go?
Discover what RHP is doing offline
-
RHP member's RL secrets
reply
like
Share